FAIR - Contribuições do utilizador [pt]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-06-05T01:57:10Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships */ attend, not participate

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to attend our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things, and they vary over time.{{ref|ChangeOrientation}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man. Eventually, all of these things, including same-sex attractions, will work together for the good of those who love God. {{ref|hafen}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Hafen}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction
|year=2009
|place=Evergreen Conference
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/public-issues/elder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction
}}.
#{{note|ChangeOrientation}} The APA has stated "Some people believe that sexual orientation is innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime." The way this develops varies from person to person. A report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health states that, "For some people, sexual orientation is continuous and fixed throughout their lives. For others, sexual orientation may be fluid and change over time." Many people have testified that through the atonement of Christ, they no longer are attracted to people of the same gender. Others have also had faith in Christ, but still have same-sex attractions. Elder Holland taught: "Through the exercise of faith, individual effort, and reliance upon the power of the Atonement, some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."
#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication only allows for sexual relationships between a husband and a wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. Throckmorton showed that those who want to change their sexual orientation did not find therapists who tried to get them to affirm a gay identity to be very helpful. ({{Citation
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}}) After working with several clients, Haldeman postulated that for some people, it would more feasible to change their sexual orientation than it would be to try to change their religious identity. ({{Citation
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}) Beckstead worked with Mormon clients and concluded that gay affirmative therapy did not help clients who did not want to be gay. ({{Citation |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }}) Statements like these have lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx] Possible non-LGBT sexual orientation identity outcomes would include heterosexual, ex-gay and no identity.
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-31T23:54:19Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Endnotes */

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things, and they vary over time.{{ref|ChangeOrientation}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man. Eventually, all of these things, including same-sex attractions, will work together for the good of those who love God. {{ref|hafen}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Hafen}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction
|year=2009
|place=Evergreen Conference
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/public-issues/elder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction
}}.
#{{note|ChangeOrientation}} The APA has stated "Some people believe that sexual orientation is innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime." The way this develops varies from person to person. A report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health states that, "For some people, sexual orientation is continuous and fixed throughout their lives. For others, sexual orientation may be fluid and change over time." Many people have testified that through the atonement of Christ, they no longer are attracted to people of the same gender. Others have also had faith in Christ, but still have same-sex attractions. Elder Holland taught: "Through the exercise of faith, individual effort, and reliance upon the power of the Atonement, some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."
#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication only allows for sexual relationships between a husband and a wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. Throckmorton showed that those who want to change their sexual orientation did not find therapists who tried to get them to affirm a gay identity to be very helpful. ({{Citation
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}}) After working with several clients, Haldeman postulated that for some people, it would more feasible to change their sexual orientation than it would be to try to change their religious identity. ({{Citation
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}) Beckstead worked with Mormon clients and concluded that gay affirmative therapy did not help clients who did not want to be gay. ({{Citation |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }}) Statements like these have lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx] Possible non-LGBT sexual orientation identity outcomes would include heterosexual, ex-gay and no identity.
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-28T19:03:40Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships */ Added Hafen's quote

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things, and they vary over time.{{ref|ChangeOrientation}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man. Eventually, all of these things, including same-sex attractions, will work together for the good of those who love God. {{ref|hafen}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Hafen}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction
|year=2009
|place=Evergreen Conference
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/public-issues/elder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction
}}.
#{{note|ChangeOrientation}} The APA has stated "Some people believe that sexual orientation is
innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime." The way this develops varies from person to person. A report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health states that, "For some people, sexual orientation is continuous and fixed throughout their lives. For others, sexual orientation may be fluid and change over time." Many people have testified that through the atonement of Christ, they no longer are attracted to people of the same gender. Others have also had faith in Christ, but still have same-sex attractions. Elder Holland taught: "Through the exercise of faith, individual effort, and reliance upon the power of the Atonement, some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."
#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-28T18:58:32Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Endnotes */ added APA and Hafen

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things, and they vary over time.{{ref|ChangeOrientation}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man.

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
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|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
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|year=1987
|pages=45
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}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Hafen}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction
|year=2009
|place=Evergreen Conference
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/public-issues/elder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction
}}.
#{{note|ChangeOrientation}} The APA has stated "Some people believe that sexual orientation is
innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime." The way this develops varies from person to person. A report from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health states that, "For some people, sexual orientation is continuous and fixed throughout their lives. For others, sexual orientation may be fluid and change over time." Many people have testified that through the atonement of Christ, they no longer are attracted to people of the same gender. Others have also had faith in Christ, but still have same-sex attractions. Elder Holland taught: "Through the exercise of faith, individual effort, and reliance upon the power of the Atonement, some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."
#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-28T18:40:23Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships */ Vary over time

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things, and they vary over time.{{ref|ChangeOrientation}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man.

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-28T18:23:23Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church is affirming */ Added section on same-sex attractions are not different than other struggles

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

=== We affirm while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Some people argue that by teaching against homosexual relationships, the church places a stigma on those with same-sex attractions, since only they would have the desire to participate in homosexual relationships, and therefore they are not fully affirmed as equal members in the Church. This is no different than teaching against heterosexual relationships outside of marriage, since only people with opposite-sex attractions would have the desire to participate in heterosexual relationships, nor is it vastly different from teaching against abortions, since only those who have had a heterosexual relationship would have the ability to have an abortion. The Church isn't any more anti-gay than it is anti-straight. Just because we have a certain desire does not mean God intendeds us to act on it. Elder Nelson explains:

"Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. We just can't live like biological specimens of some kind, responding to whatever urges; we have to discipline and control those things."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Everyone will have a desire to disobey some of the commandments of God. The exact nature of the desires vary from person to person. Because of the fall of Adam, all mankind has become "carnal, sensual, and devilish, by nature". (Alma 42:10) One of the reasons we have these desires is so that there can be an opposition in all things. (2 Nephi 2:11) If we were not enticed by the one or the other, we would not learn to distinguish good from evil and hence we really would not be able to act for ourselves.(2 Nephi 2:16) God gives us weaknesses so we can be humble and turn to him. (Ether 12:27) By yielding to God, we can overcome the natural tendency to sin, and become who God wants us to be, (Mosiah 3:19) but unless we had the desire to sin in the first place, we would have no need to repent and hence couldn't turn to God. (Alma 42:17) The fall of Adam and our subsequent desire to sin is an essential part of the plan of a loving God to ultimately bring us joy. (2 Nephi 2:25) Everyone seeking to be saved has to deal with the desire to sin and put off the natural man through the atonement of Christ. The desire for homosexual relationships is no different than any other desire to disobey the commandments of God.

The Church affirms those with same-sex attractions who have a desire to have homosexual relationships, not by pretending that such relationships are not sinful, but by including them in a vast brotherhood of other mortals who are similarly dealing with the desires of the natural man.

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-24T23:35:06Z

JoshuaJohanson: add ref to Pres Packer

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population.{{ref|packer01}} People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T23:38:00Z

JoshuaJohanson: Undo revision 72035 by JoshuaJohanson (Talk)

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
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|year=1971
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|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
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|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
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}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
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|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
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|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T23:35:34Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Endnotes */ changed gay to SSA

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are people who are attracted to the same gender for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation c]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T23:08:08Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church is welcoming */ Previous version made it sound like we only love people who obey the commandments. We love everyone.

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the expectation, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
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|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
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|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T23:03:04Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Criticism */ Someone's sexual identity is different than their sexual attractions. Some incorrectly believe the Church accepts people with same-sex attractions, but not those with a gay identity.

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the qualification, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T23:01:19Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Criticism */ The criticism doesn't just apply to members. It also applies to former members, potential converts, and even people unaffiliated.

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting people who experience same-sex attraction.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the qualification, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
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|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
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|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T22:58:57Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Criticism */ This article really doesn't deal with same-sex marriage. I think that would be a great article, but this one does not deal with that.

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting members who experience same-sex attraction.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the qualification, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-11T22:57:49Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church is welcoming */ Putting Evergreen and North Star in separate sentences

==Criticism==
*The Church is accused of rejecting members who experience same-sex attraction.
*The Church's public stand on the issue of same-sex marriage is portrayed as being bigoted and homophobic.

==Response==
{{Epigraph|I emphasize this, I wish to say that our opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage should never be interpreted as justification for hatred, intolerance, or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group. As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. 
—President Gordon B. Hinckley, ''Why We Do Some of the Things We Do'', October 1999 General Conference}}
{{parabreak}}

Elder Dallin Oakes notes the distinction between having feelings of same-sex attraction and acting upon those feelings,
<blockquote>
[W]e should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of “fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,” the Presidency added: “Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. {{ref|oaks95}}
</blockquote>

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ, we have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires that we act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We understand that we have been granted the ability to make those choices, and understand that some may choose to disobey the commandments of God. As members of the Church, we must balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who are attempting to obey His commandments, and respect the right to choose of those who do not do so. Respecting the right of a person to choose a path contrary to God's will means that we should not treat individuals who do so with hatred or bigotry.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who experience same-sex attraction. In 1999, he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church. It is expected, however, that they follow the same God-given rules of conduct that apply to everyone else, whether single or married. {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. Note the qualification, however, that the commandments must be kept.

In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church. Some belong to [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], which is the only organization for people with same-sex attractions outside of the official church structure with General Authority designated representation, and a direct working relationship with LDS Family Services. [http://northstarlds.org North Star] is another organization formed by individual members who seek to encourage one another to follow the teachings of the Church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
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|editor=LDS Church
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
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#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
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#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
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|year= 2004
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|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-05-04T22:40:05Z

JoshuaJohanson: Made a few changes

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who are attracted to the same sex are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the Church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. Elder Oaks explains:

"Homosexual behavior is and will always remain before the Lord an abominable sin."{{ref|Oaks07}}

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the Church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the Church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the Church.

==The Church is affirming==

The Church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the Church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the Church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The Church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:

"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the Church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the Church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the Church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the Church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-29T22:51:48Z

JoshuaJohanson: Added Laumann reference

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "

Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|pages=299}}

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-22T14:23:22Z

JoshuaJohanson: refs

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|Adultery}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|RejectSameSexAttractions}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "

Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|Brown63}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
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|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
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}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|Adultery}} See Matt 19:18, Matt 15:19 and Mark 7:21. This excludes all sexual relationships between unmarried people. It was apparent that Christ only recognized marriage between a man and a woman. (Matt 19:4-6) Modern revelation confirms that the Biblical teaching against adultery and fornication prohibits sexual relationships between everyone besides husband and wife.
#{{note|RejectSameSexAttractions}} [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity: Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|Brown63}} In the 1963 General Conference, Hugh B. Brown stated: "it is a moral evil for any person or group of persons to deny any human being the rights to gainful employment, to full educational opportunity, and to every privilege of citizenship". He continued: "We call upon all men everywhere, both within and outside the church, to commit themselves to the establishment of full civil equality for all of God's children. Anything less than this defeats our high ideal of the brotherhood of man."
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T23:45:19Z

JoshuaJohanson: typo

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "

Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T18:19:09Z

JoshuaJohanson: separating quotations

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to:

"Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that:

"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

Elder Oaks similarly stated:

"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains:

"When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said:

"I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught:

"All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught:

"Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught:

"The Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity:

"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains:

"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads:

"Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:

"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "

Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains:

"Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister:

"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads:

"I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
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|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
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|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
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#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
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|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
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#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
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#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
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|last2=King
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|date=December 26 2004
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#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
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|last2= Matis
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#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:25:54Z

JoshuaJohanson: typos

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessarily having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a disservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interferes with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:24:30Z

JoshuaJohanson: not all other organizations

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While some organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:19:32Z

JoshuaJohanson: Took out mourn for those poor people with same-sex attractions from intro.

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made take upon ourselves the name of Christ, to always remember Him, and keep His commandments which He has given us. This covenant requires us to act as Christ would act, including the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
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|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|year=2007
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#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
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|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
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#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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|year=1992
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|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
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#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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|year=1992
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|publisher=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
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#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
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|last2=King
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|date=December 26 2004
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#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
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|last2= Matis
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#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:16:20Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The church is respectful */ ->Church

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The Church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:15:56Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church beings peace */ -> brings

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church brings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T16:15:27Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church helps them find peace */ ->brings peace

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church beings peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
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|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
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#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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|year=1992
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|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
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#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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|year=1992
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}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
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#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
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|last2=King
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#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
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|last2= Matis
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#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T06:19:34Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The church is respectful */ typo

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church helps them find peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T06:14:44Z

JoshuaJohanson: Final touches

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church helps them find peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, people are empowered to choose whether or not they will obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the California Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which implies that some people are born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges, and their only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and may lead to hopelessness and despair.

The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found that helping clients reject their same-sex attractions produces any negative effects, and in some cases, they recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. ***However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-20T02:01:49Z

JoshuaJohanson: cleared up a few spots

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments given by Jesus Christ. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. In the Church, we believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) An important part of this covenant is the duty to love, serve and uplift our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

The other great commandment is to love God, and this includes a devotion to obey and proclaim His commandments, including the commandment to abstain from same-sex relationships. Obeying these commandments will bring happiness and peace in this life, and eternal life in the world to come. Many people are striving to obey these commandments, and others will become converted upon hearing the restored gospel of Christ.

We can love our neighbor by welcoming them to come unto Christ and inviting them to keep His commandments. We affirm that all mankind can obey these commandments. We respect everyone's choices, even if they decide to disobey the commandments of God. In this way we balance our duty to love God, welcome and affirm those who want or may want to obey His commandments, and respect those who do not.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many people with same-sex attractions are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation by joining the church, where they have found peace.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} Having same-sex attractions, participating in same-sex relationships, and identifying as gay or lesbian are three separate things. A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never engaged in homosexual behavior. This number differs from those who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual. For them, only 13% of men and 4% of women have never engaged in homosexual behavior. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}} Some who have engaged in homosexual behavior have stopped and others will stop when they hear the gospel of Jesus Christ and are converted.

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders explains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support their members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man with same-sex attractions, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

Elder Oaks taught, "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks further taught, "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only becomes involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has recently warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone of the opposite sex for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church helps them find peace ===

By coming to Christ, we can find peace and happiness in this life. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Proclaiming the gospel is one of the greatest goods we can do for our brothers and sisters, and will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. Others will want to live the higher moral code upon hearing the restored gospel. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

***An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people can accomplish the things which the Lord commands them.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told that they do not have the ability to obey the commandments of God. Without the faith that they can obey the commandments of God, they become weak and become victims of their circumstances, rather than learning to act for themselves. By teaching that they can act for themselves, this empowers them and enables them to chose whether or not they want to obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions need to participate in same-sex relationships in order to be true to themselves, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which by entension implies that some people were born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who they identify as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that the have no power over their sexual urges, and the only choice is to act on them. This can cause those who want to obey the commandments of God to feel trapped and bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

This stance also invalidates the decision of those who are obeying the commandments of God, and may cause them to second-guess their decision. Those with same-sex attractions who are celibate or heterosexually married are often under attack. The Iowa Supreme Court similarly said those who they have identified as gay cannot fulfill "their deeply felt need for a committed personal relationship" in a marriage to someone of the opposite sex.{{ref|Iowa}} Denying the existence of people who have had success only serves to alienate them and push them further into the closet. It may make them second guess themselves, which may weaken their marriage. The Church is one of the few places that supports people in mixed-orientation marriages.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}} They have not found any negative effects in helping clients reject their same-sex attractions, and in some cases, recommend it for clients.{{ref|getRef}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to choose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions do not have the ability to obey the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they choose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who choose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. ***However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, nor does it require that we go against those who deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the commandments of God. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who have made that choice and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who choose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with, while holding firm to the commandments, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who want to or may want to obey the commandments of God; and love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make.

We welcome and affirm those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian, just as we do for those with opposite-sex attractions. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for all of God's children.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Iowa}} http://www.kcci.com/download/2009/0403/19084885.pdf
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
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|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
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|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
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|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
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#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
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#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
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|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
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|magazine=Ensign
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|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
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#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
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|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
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|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
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|year=1992
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#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
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#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
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}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
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#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
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#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
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}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-04-14T23:43:09Z

JoshuaJohanson: Added discussion about respect and terminology

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

We welcome these brothers and sisters into the Church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, including the decision to abstain from same-sex relationships. We also help them by respecting their decision even if that includes disobeying the commandments of God.

== The Church is welcoming ==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

Like all of God's children, the Church teaches that people who refer to themselves as gay are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards homosexuality, President Kimball reminds the readers to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}}

The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International] and [http://northstarlds.org North Star]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and several books published by Church members.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend Evergreen meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The church welcomes all people, whether they refer to themselves as gay or straight. Many who refer to themselves as gay have accepted this invitation and have joined the church and have reported finding peace in serving the Lord.

=== We welcome while teaching against same-sex relationships ===

Everyone is welcome to participate in our services, but to be a member one must first make a covenant to follow the commandments of God. Jesus Christ taught that we should abstain from fornication and adultery.{{ref|getRef}} This includes all relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. People with same-sex attractions are subject to these laws as much as those with opposite-sex attractions. You cannot have a same-sex relationship without disobeying the commandments given to us by Jesus Christ. We are not at liberty to change the law for a segment of the population. We will continue to defend this standard and the definition that marriage is between a man and a woman.

Those who refer to themselves as gay are not necessariliy having same-sex relationships. Gay is an adjective that can refer to thoughts, attractions or behaviors.{{ref|Oaks07}} A study by the Social Organization of Sexuality found that 60% of men and 68% of women who were attracted to the same gender have never had a homosexual experience. For the people who identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual, the number drops to 13% of men and 4% of women. From studies like these, the American Psychological Association has determined that "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa??}}

Because of the strong correlation between identifying as gay or lesbian and having homosexual relationships, many members of the church who are attracted to the same gender do not refer to themselves as gay, and the Church avoids the usage. For members of the church, our main identity is not the gender we are attracted to, but the fact that we are sons or daughters of God. As such, the Church does not refer to people as either gay or straight. Some may chose to continue to refer to themselves as gay or straight and they are welcome in the church.

==The Church is affirming==

The church affirms that those with same-sex attraction are good people including those who refer to themselves as gay and seeks to assure them that they can find peace and happiness in this life. In an interview with the San Jose Mercury News, President Hinckley stated:

"Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Not all members who identify as gay have felt this. Elder Holland recounts the story of one man who was concerned that because he was gay, he could not be a good member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed that he had not transgressed, and promised:

"If your life is in harmony with the commandments, then you are worthy to serve in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with the members, attend the temple, and receive all the blessings of the Savior’s Atonement."{{ref|holland07}}

Church leaders have not limited their affirmation to those who keep the standards of the Church. In the "Miracle of Forgiveness", Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

This affirmation is important as many people with same-sex attraction may feel that they are not good people. By assuring people with same-sex attractions that they are good people, the church affirms them in their identity as children of God. Instruction given to Church leaders exaplains: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

The leaders of the Church understand and support its members with same-sex attractions. They recognize that some may face struggles with their same-sex attractions. In reference to a man whose same-sex attractions have caused a struggle, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church is helpful ==

The church seeks to help all people, including those with same-sex attractions. President Hinckley explains:

"Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them."{{ref|Hinckley98}}

This call of duty of members to help all people extend in special force to people who are struggling, including those who may find their same-sex attractions to be a struggle. Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attractions. The Church has sought to protect people from physical and verbal abuse regardless of their choice in sexual conduct. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing""—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

Beyond simply teaching this doctrine, the Church has advocated for legal protections for people regardless of their sexual orientation or gender identity. This is significant because the Church only gets involved in politics if serious moral issues are involved.{{ref|Oaks09}} When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect people from housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

The Church also helps people with same-sex attractions by steering them away from destructive patterns. The Church helps them to see that they shouldn't blame themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against aversive therapies that have been used on people with same-sex attractions which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} while at the same time supporting those who want to get married to someone for whom they have developed an attraction.{{ref|Oaks07}} They have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92}} They have assured members that having same-sex attractions is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

Most important, the teachings of the Church on homosexuality help people with same-sex attractions to obey the commandments of God and find peace in their lives. Directing his comments to men who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

=== The Church helps them find peace ===

The mission of the Church is to invite all people unto Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our brothers and sisters. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our brothers and sisters, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and that includes all sexual relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if we do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. Our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God, and does more to help someone feel good then attempting to change the commandments.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many members with same-sex attractions who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches its members to abstain from same-sex relationships. Elder Wickman explains: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want as many people to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation as possible. If we teach that people with opposite-sex attractions need to be willing to sacrifice their sexual desires, but not people with same-sex attractions, then we are doing a diservice to those with same-sex attractions.

=== The Church is empowering ===

An essential part of obeying the commandments is having the faith that you are capable of obeying the commandments. We believe all people are capable of obeying the commandments of God.(1 Nephi 3:7) Unfortunately, too often people are told they are incapable of obeying the commandments of God. This limits their capabilities and prevents them from obtaining the peace that comes through obedience. By ensuring people that they are capable of obedience, we empower them to make their own decision. This enables them to chose whether or not to obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attractions are incapable of abstaining from same-sex relationships, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach the doctrine that people who they refer to as gay or lesbian are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that being gay was something "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth" and that their "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for a person they identified as gay to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which by entension implies that some people were born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful to those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian. They may come to believe that the have no power over their sexual urges, and the only choice is to act on them. Those who do not want to pursue same-sex relationships are told that option is not available to them. Those who are married to someone of the opposite sex or who wish to be are told mixed-orientation marriages are doomed. This can cause them to feel trapped and bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Psychologists have found that it is unhealthy to prevent a person from living according to their values. They found that telling them they are incapable of living according to their values interfers with their autonomy and self-determination, which is a key element to a successful resolution in therapy.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} The American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own informed choices when they come to them for help with unwanted same-sex attractions. They are to support them in living according to their own values, even if this means helping them change their sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man. We fought a war in heaven to protect this agency. If someone who refers to themself as gay or lesbian is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, then they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves. They have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that everyone has a choice in their sexual behavior and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that people with same-sex attractions are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers them. The Church teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

=== The Church helps family members ===

Another way the Church extends a helping hand to people who are attracted to the same sex is by supporting their families. They encourage family members to love and reach out to their family members, regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

The Church helps family members to balance their love for their children who chose not to obey God's commandments and their love for God and devotion to His commandments. Elder Oaks explains: "Love and tolerance are incomplete unless they are accompanied by a concern for truth and a commitment to the unity God has commanded of his servants... Carried to an undisciplined excess, love and tolerance can produce indifference to truth and justice, and opposition to unity."{{ref|oaks94}}

Families with members with same-sex attractions are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman (Leigh) who is involved in a sexual relationship with another woman wrote an "Ensign" article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister. "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. This can be done while holding strong to the teachings of the gospel.

== The church is respectful ==

By empowering people with same-sex attraction to make their own decision regarding their sexual behavior, some will decide of their own free will and choice not to obey the standards of the church and hence disqualify themselves from membership in the Church. We respect their decision. However, respecting their decision does not require the church to agree with their decision, which would mean we would have to disagree with the decision of those who have chosen to deal with same-sex attractions in a manner consistent with the teachings Christ left during his mortal ministry. Elder Oaks taught:

"Tolerance obviously requires a non-contentious manner of relating toward one another’s differences. But tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination."{{ref|Oaks99}}

While we may disagree with the decision to pursue same-sex relationships, we always strive to uplift those who chose that and show kindness to them. For example, the Church has always been supportive of civil rights for all people.{{ref|getRef}} This includes those who chose to enter same-sex relationships. We do not oppose any civil rights, including those regarding hospitalization and medical care, fair housing and employment rights, or probate rights.{{ref|LDS08}} (The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right.){{ref|NotACivilRight}} The statement showing support for the Salt Lake anti-discrimination bill reads "I represent a church that believes in human dignity, in treating others with respect even when we disagree - in fact, especially when we disagree. The Church’s past statements are on the public record for all to see. In these comments and in our actions, we try to follow what Jesus Christ taught. Our language will always be respectful and acknowledge those who differ, but will also be clear on matters that we feel are of great consequence to our society."{{ref|LDS09}}

By always showing love and respect to those we disagree with while holding firm to the teachings Christ left us during His mortal ministry, the Church balances its duty to show love to God by defending and proclaiming His commandments; its duty to welcome, affirm and help those with same-sex attractions who may want to obey the commandments of God; and its duty to love our neighbor, regardless of the choices they make. The actions of the Church have consistently been based in love for those with same-sex attractions, including those who refer to themselves as gay or lesbian.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]
#{{note|NotACivilRight}} Some have accused the church of denying a group of people their civil right to marry based on their sexual orientation. This is not true. Nowhere is there any requirement based on sexual orientation in order to marry. People of all sexual orientations get married in all parts of the world. Many members with same-sex attractions have been able to form fulfilling and faithful marriages to people of the opposite sex. Marriage, as defined by God, is a union between a man and a woman, and everyone is allowed to participate. Political involvement by the church has been focused on protecting this definition. Same-sex marriage is not really a marriage by the definition given by God and is therefore not a civil right. Elder Oaks explains: "The Church does not consider same-sex marriage to be a civil right. We have endured a wave of media-reported charges that the Mormons are trying to "deny" people or "strip" people of their "rights." After a significant majority of California voters (seven million - over 52 percent) approved Proposition 8’s limiting marriage to a man and a woman, some opponents characterized the vote as denying people their civil rights. In fact, the Proposition 8 battle was not about civil rights, but about what equal rights demand and what religious rights protect. At no time did anyone question or jeopardize the civil right of Proposition 8 opponents to vote or speak their views."
#{{note|oaks94}} (Dallin Oaks, "Our strengths can become our downfall, " Ensign, October, 1994, 19.
#{{note|oaks99}}{{Citation
|last=Oaks
|first=Dallin H.
|place=BYU Devotional speech
|year=1999
|date=9 February 1999
|title=Weightier Matters
}}
#{{note|LDS08}} [
http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction/Myths about the Church and homosexuality

2010-02-23T01:52:50Z

JoshuaJohanson:

Hafen

As Dr. Jeff Robinson said, [vii] you can’t hate your way out of your attraction.

label yourself as gay

But if you feel an attraction you didn’t seek and haven’t acted on, you have nothing to repent of. So how can you qualify for the Atonement’s power?

I classify same-gender attraction within the category of “adversity,” because typically you haven’t brought it upon yourselves.

However, we can tolerate or permit that behavior without also endorsing it — that is, promoting and encouraging that behavior, which we have historically done only when the behavior serves a significant public purpose.

And while same-gender attraction is not a sin, you need to resist cultivating immoral, lustful thoughts toward those of either gender

An LDS medical doctor who has worked closely with many people who deal with same-gender attraction recently said to me, “This is a truly difficult problem, but in its very difficulty is something that allows those who meet the challenge to become amazingly purified and sanctified and thus qualified for special comfort and revelation from the Savior, who knows how to succor ‘all’ men and women in their infirmities.” His words prompted a memory of Elder Maxwell’s insight: “If we are serious about our discipleship, Jesus will eventually request each of us to do those very things which are [the] most difficult to do.” The apostle Paul wrote, “All things work together for good to them that love God” (Romans 8:28). Even same-gender attraction can work for your good IF you love God.

== Higher standard ==
Some critics argue that while both gay and straight members must obey the church's law of chastity, gay members are discriminated against because they are expected to live a higher standard. They argue that the teaching that gay people must control homosexual feelings is unrealistic. They argue that the law of chastity is discriminatory because straight members can find companionship and fulfillment through marriage, while gay members cannot because the church does not recognize same-sex marriages.

=== Opportunity for marriage ===

While same-sex attraction is most definitely an obstacle in creating a fulfilling marriage, it is not a barrier. To say that gay people cannot find fulfillment in marriage is extreme. One study indicated that 20% of gay men are currently married to a woman, some of whom find their marriages to be fulfilling.{{ref|moore}}{{ref|GayMormonMarried}} Fulfillment in marriage is not solely based on sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is not solely based on sexual orientation. While many gay people do not want to marry, others do develop a love for an opposite-sex partner and go on to have a fulfilling marriage. Sexual orientation is only small part in sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is only a small part in marital fulfillment.

Marriage may not be the appropriate course of action for everyone, and the Church has warned against entering into a marriage before one is ready. However, there are circumstances in which the church supports marriage for gay people. Elder Oaks explains:

"Persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity — that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

=== Pressure to get married ===

=== Being single in a family-centered church ===

Critics argue that gay people who chose to be celibate can never really be accepted in a church which is so focused on the family. While some gay people may have a fulfilling marriage, there are many gay members of the church for whom marriage is not a realistic option. Elder Holland teaches "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all. Perhaps no offer of marriage is forthcoming. Perhaps even after marriage there is an inability to have children. Or perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

It is true that having same-sex attractions presents an additional challenge for gay members to find fulfillment in a marriage which straight members do not have to deal with. However, gay people are not the only ones who have a challenge in forming a fulfilling marriage. Elder Oaks explains: "That's not a unique problem to homosexuals. One of the largest demographic problems we have in the Church are single women, divorced, never married, widowed. They've got the same problem. It is difficult for them and we're doing what we can to make singles feel more at home. But in the eternities the family relationship is the thing that we're most interested in. But we don't condemn the person who's single now. We say, work for that destiny." {{ref|oaks86}}

Critics also argue that being single is an additional burden for gay people who wish to remain faithful in the church. Elder Oaks responds "Every person who is single who has a sex drive and is not able to satisfy that outside the bonds of marriage with out being in transgression is carrying a burden. That burden is carried by homosexuals and it's carried by heterosexuals. It's a lesser burden for a person who does not have such a strong sex drive. But it's a burden in any event, and it's not unique to the homosexual." {{ref|oaks86}}

Celibacy is required for all single people, no matter what reason they give for not being able to get married. Both gay and straight people have been able to find joy and happiness in single life.

=== Controlling homosexual feelings ===

In a 2007 interview, Elder Oaks taught "Homosexual feelings are controllable. Perhaps there is an inclination or susceptibility to such feelings that is a reality for some and not a reality for others. But out of such susceptibilities come feelings, and feelings are controllable."{{ref|oaks07}}

Critics of the church argue that teaching that members should control homosexual feelings goes beyond asking members to control their behavior. They argue that being gay means having homosexual feelings, and by not accepting homosexual feelings, the church in reality is not accepting gay people.

The church does not just ask members to control homosexual feelings, but all feelings, including heterosexual feelings. It is important not to misinterpret Elder Oaks. He is not saying that homosexual feelings are chosen, but that they must be controlled even if one did not chose to have them in the first place.{{ref|oaks95}} The church teaches all member that they should "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage." This includes a commandment for all unmarried people to "control our thoughts" and "not participate in conversations or activities that arouse sexual feelings, such as passionate kissing, lying with or on top of another person, or touching the private, sacred parts of another person's body, with or without clothing."{{ref|chastity}} The commandment for unmarried people not to "arouse sexual feelings" applies equally to gay and straight people.

Elder Oaks said "Jesus taught that to look on a woman and lust after her is a sin. And everyone is encouraged to control their feelings, heterosexual or homosexual. That's part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. People who act out those feelings, whether they're homosexual or heterosexual, are in danger of Church discipline. The Church discourages them, calls them to repentance, works with them, counsels them and ultimately disciplines them if necessary." {{ref|oaks86}} Surely, it would be just as natural for a straight man to have heterosexual feelings for a woman as it is for a gay person to have homosexual feelings for someone of the same sex, but both have been commanded to learn to control their sexual feelings.

== Homosexual problems ==
While discussing homosexuality on an interview with Larry King, President Hinckley said that "Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them. We know they have a problem. We want to help them solve that problem."{{ref|larryking04}} Critics of the church argue that by saying that gay people have problems, the church places a stigma on them.

It is important to understand exactly what homosexual problems are. It is more than simply having a homosexual orientation. A 1992 publication by the Church gives the following definition of homosexual problems: "Homosexual problems include erotic thoughts, feelings, and behavior directed toward persons of the same sex."{{ref|lds92}} The Church teaches both gay and straight members to "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage".{{ref|chastity}} Gay people are not the only ones that have erotic thoughts, feelings, and behaviors outside of marriage. Elder Nelson explains that "Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

In an interview about same-sex attraction, Elder Oaks responded to an interviewer's question about homosexuality: "Everyone has some challenges they have to struggle with. You’ve described a particular kind of challenge that is very vexing. It is common in our society and it has also become politicized. But it’s only one of a host of challenges men and women have to struggle with."

Like straight people, gay people also have problems, and depend upon the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ. That is the basis of the Church's belief, and there is no reason to suppose why it would be any different for gay people.
The church does ask a lot of its gay members, but a lot is asked of straight members as well. The counsel of the church to gay members might seem harsh to those unfamiliar with the counsel given to the membership of the church in general. The follow chart compares some of the counsel given to gay members versus that given to the general membership of the church.

== Inappropriate sexual advances ==
In October General Conference of 1976, Elder Packer gave a speech on morality in the priesthood session. In it, he talks about homosexuality and encourages young men to "vigorously resist" any males "who entice young men to join them in these immoral acts." He tells of a missionary who was concerned when he had "floored" his companion for making unwanted advances on him. He told the missionary, "Well, thanks. Somebody had to do it, and it wouldn't be well for a General Authority to solve the problem that way." He then recounts, "I am not recommending that course to you, but I am not omitting it. You must protect yourself." This was later published and distributed in a pamphlet called "To Young Men Only".{{ref|packer76}}

Dr. Quinn argues that by counting this story, Elder Packer is endorsing a form of gay-bashing, and that by republishing the story, the church itself endorses gay-bashing.{{ref|quinn}}

It is doubtful that Elder Packer was approving of gay bashing. He was probably condemning inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the gender or sexual orientation of the perpetrator. Earlier he had taught: "Never let anyone handle you or touch those very personal parts of your body which are an essential link in the ongoing of creation."{{ref|packer72}} His language against gey people who make inappropriate sexual advances was no different than against straight people who likewise make inappropriate sexual advances. He is no more endorsing gay-bashing then straight-bashing. Later, in response to accusations that the church rejects gay people, he answered "We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior."{{ref|packer01}} By looking at these two quotes, it becomes apparent that Elder Packer does not reject gay people, but only rejects the behavior of making inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the sexual orientation.

== Old Intro ==
LGBT people are welcome in the church, and are affirmed as good people. The leaderships of the church has unanimously expressed love to gay people. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is not anti-gay but is infact an LGBT welcoming and affirming church. Most of the accusations of the church being anti-gay centers around a few misunderstandings:

1) You can't be affirming of LGBT
Is being gay a sin?-affirming
Does BYU allow gay students? - welcoming
Are homosexuals an abomination? - affirming
Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? - affirming
Does the Church support aversion therapy? - afirming
Doesn't the church's teachings on same-sex relationships interfer with its teachings on agency?
Causes of Homosexuality

There was a Georgia Tech gay rights manual that referred to the church as anti-gay. However, a judge ordered that the material be removed because there was no basis for the accusation.(http://www.wrcbtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=8258001 Judge rules Georgia Tech gay rights manual biased". Associated Press. May 1, 200) President Hinckley told Larry King in an interview that the church was not anti-gay.

==Isn't the church anti-gay if it teaches against same-sex relationship? ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships outside of a marriage between a man and a woman. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Elder Packer explains:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

Many people have a hard distinguishing between sexual orientation and sexual activity. They often think a reject of homosexual practices is a rejection of people with a homosexual orientation.

Many people unfamiliar with homosexuality will often lump people with same-sex attractions, people who have sexual relations with people of the same gender, and people

Not all gay people want to pursue same-sex relationships. The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States

According to some book, only a small percentage of people with same-sex attractions have participated in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} There are also several accounts of those who had participated in homosexual behavior who have since abandoned the practice or are seeking to. One survey indicated that 20% of gay men and 40% of lesbians are married to someone of the opposite sex. This puts estimates at some number. According to this one study, this segment of the population is often overlooked. While these people may not be as vocal as the other segments of the gay and lesbian population, it is an important segment and their views should not be discounted.

Is the Church anti-gay?

President Hinckley said the Church wasn't anti-gay, but pro-family.{{ref|larryking04}} The Church has spoken out against gay-bashing or any type of hostility towards gay people. Elder Oaks reminded members that people who are attracted to the same gender are in "special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members".{{ref|oaks95}} Many gay members of the Church have expressed their gratitude for the Church's stance on homosexuality.

Newline.

A Georgia Tech manual labeled the Mormon Church as anti-gay, but a complaint was made, and a judge sided with the students and mandated that the reference to the Mormon church being anti-gay be removed.

This may or may not relate to their actual sexual orientation. In a 1990 study by the Social Organization of Sexuality, only 16% of women and 36% of men who reported some level of same-sex attraction had a homosexual or bisexual identity. The same survey found that 96% of women and 87% of men with a homosexual or bisexual identity had participated in sex with someone of the same sex, as contrasted to 32% of women and 43% of men who had same-sex attractions. According to a 1990 study of The Social Organization of Sexuality, out of 131 women and 108 men who self-reported [[same-sex attraction]], only 43 men (40%) and 42 women (32%) had participated in gay sex. {{ref|laumann}}

Given recent prevalence estimates most pastoral caregivers and counselors will work with persons who experience same-sex attraction (SSA). Many of the people who experience SSA will report such a consistency in the directionality and intensity of their attractions that they think of themselves as having a homosexual orientation. Others will integrate their experiences of SSA into a gay identity. What can facilitate pastoral care and counseling is an intentional use of this three-tier distinction: experiences of SSA, homosexual orientation, and gay identity. A discussion of this three-tier distinction is followed by specific suggestions for utilizing this conceptual framework as a resource in pastoral care and counseling.{{ref|yarhouse}}

When homosexual attraction, homosexual identity, and same-sex sexual behavior were entered to predict suicide attempt, only same-sex sexual behavior was significantly predictive.{{ref|suicide}}

== Is being gay a sin? ==

No. Elder Oaks taught "It’s no sin to have inclinations that if yielded to would produce behavior that would be a transgression. The sin is in yielding to temptation. Temptation is not unique. Even the Savior was tempted." {{ref|oaks07}} The pamphlet "God Loveth His Children" encourages gay members to neither blame themselves nor their parents for their attractions.{{ref|GodLoveth}}

==Does BYU allow gay students? ==

Yes. Sexual orientation was never an honor code issue, but in 2008 the honor code was revised to specifically state "Sexual orientation is not an honor code issue." Outside groups, including Soulforce, have criticized BYU's policy against same-sex relationships, but gay students who go to BYU have spoken in favor of BYU's honor code.

==Are homosexuals an abomination? ==

The previous version of the For the Strength of the Youth pamphlet included the phrase "Homosexuality is an abomination". At the time of publication, homosexuality referred to sexual relations between people of the same gender. Now homosexuality is considered a sexual orientation, which may not be related to a person's sexual practices. The Church considers all sexual relationships except those between a husband and a wife as an abomination. (Alma 39:5) The abomination is the sexual act, not the person committing it. In his book, Miracle of Forgiveness, Elder Kimball said he believes many homosexuals are "basically good people who have become trapped in sin," referring to those who were having same-sex relationships.{{ref|miracle}}

==Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? ==

No. Elder Holland taught "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all... Perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

In 1987, President Hinckley taught "Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices."{{ref|hinckley87}} In 1992, the Church came out with more elaborate instructions. "Marriage should not be viewed as a way to resolve homosexual problems. The lives of others should not be damaged by entering a marriage where such concerns exist. Encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement. However, some people have reported that once they are freed from homosexual problems, heterosexual feelings have gradually emerged."{{ref|lds92}}

Again in 2007, Elder Oaks commented on President Hinckley's 1987 statement: "To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. On the other hand, persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity - that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

While there is no requirement nor encouragement for gay people to marry, there is no restriction either. Elder Holland notes "Some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."{{ref|holland07}} Many members with same-sex attraction are faithfully married, and have reported happiness and fulfillment in these marriages.

== Does the Church support aversion therapy? ==

Elder Oaks answered this question in a 2007 interview. He said:

"The Church rarely takes a position on which treatment techniques are appropriate, for medical doctors or for psychiatrists or psychologists and so on.

The second point is that there are abusive practices that have been used in connection with various mental attitudes or feelings. Over-medication in respect to depression is an example that comes to mind. The aversive therapies that have been used in connection with same-sex attraction have contained some serious abuses that have been recognized over time within the professions. While we have no position about what the medical doctors do (except in very, very rare cases - abortion would be such an example), we are conscious that there are abuses and we don’t accept responsibility for those abuses. Even though they are addressed at helping people we would like to see helped, we can’t endorse every kind of technique that’s been used."{{ref|oaks07}}

There were experiments done on aversion therapy at Brigham Young University by McBride in the 1970s.{{ref|McBride}} Although Brigham Young University is owned by the Church, it is still given a great degree of autonomy, and graduate students typically do not seek for church approval before conducting research projects. At the time, homosexuality was considered a mental disorder, and aversion therapy was a standard tool used in the medical profession to treat homosexuality.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|apa2000}}[http://www.aglp.org/pages/cfactsheets.html#Anchor-Gay-14210 American Psychiatric Association] 2000
#{{note|apa}}[http://www.apahelpcenter.org/articles/article.php?id=31 American Psychological Association Help Center] Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality
#{{note|apa2007}}[http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbc/publications/therapeutic-response.pdf Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation]
#{{note|beckstead}}{{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }}
#{{note|honorcode}}{{Citation
|author=Brigham Young University
|author-link=Brigham Young University
|title=The Honor Code and Applications: Live a Chaste and Virtuous Life
|publisher=Brigham Young University
|place=Provo, Utah
|url=http://honorcode.byu.edu/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3599&Itemid=4643
}}.
#{{note|aversiontherapy}}{{Citation |url= http://www.glbtq.com/social-sciences/aversion_therapy.html |title= Aversion Therapy |publisher= glptq.com |accessdate= [[2007-12-20]] }}
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|nytstyle}}[http://www.glaad.org/Page.aspx?pid=380 AP, The New York Times & Washington Post Style]
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Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction/Myths about the Church and homosexuality

2010-02-23T00:07:23Z

JoshuaJohanson:

Hafen

As Dr. Jeff Robinson said, [vii] you can’t hate your way out of your attraction.

label yourself as gay

But if you feel an attraction you didn’t seek and haven’t acted on, you have nothing to repent of. So how can you qualify for the Atonement’s power?

I classify same-gender attraction within the category of “adversity,” because typically you haven’t brought it upon yourselves.

However, we can tolerate or permit that behavior without also endorsing it — that is, promoting and encouraging that behavior, which we have historically done only when the behavior serves a significant public purpose.

And while same-gender attraction is not a sin, you need to resist cultivating immoral, lustful thoughts toward those of either gender

== Higher standard ==
Some critics argue that while both gay and straight members must obey the church's law of chastity, gay members are discriminated against because they are expected to live a higher standard. They argue that the teaching that gay people must control homosexual feelings is unrealistic. They argue that the law of chastity is discriminatory because straight members can find companionship and fulfillment through marriage, while gay members cannot because the church does not recognize same-sex marriages.

=== Opportunity for marriage ===

While same-sex attraction is most definitely an obstacle in creating a fulfilling marriage, it is not a barrier. To say that gay people cannot find fulfillment in marriage is extreme. One study indicated that 20% of gay men are currently married to a woman, some of whom find their marriages to be fulfilling.{{ref|moore}}{{ref|GayMormonMarried}} Fulfillment in marriage is not solely based on sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is not solely based on sexual orientation. While many gay people do not want to marry, others do develop a love for an opposite-sex partner and go on to have a fulfilling marriage. Sexual orientation is only small part in sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is only a small part in marital fulfillment.

Marriage may not be the appropriate course of action for everyone, and the Church has warned against entering into a marriage before one is ready. However, there are circumstances in which the church supports marriage for gay people. Elder Oaks explains:

"Persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity — that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

=== Pressure to get married ===

=== Being single in a family-centered church ===

Critics argue that gay people who chose to be celibate can never really be accepted in a church which is so focused on the family. While some gay people may have a fulfilling marriage, there are many gay members of the church for whom marriage is not a realistic option. Elder Holland teaches "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all. Perhaps no offer of marriage is forthcoming. Perhaps even after marriage there is an inability to have children. Or perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

It is true that having same-sex attractions presents an additional challenge for gay members to find fulfillment in a marriage which straight members do not have to deal with. However, gay people are not the only ones who have a challenge in forming a fulfilling marriage. Elder Oaks explains: "That's not a unique problem to homosexuals. One of the largest demographic problems we have in the Church are single women, divorced, never married, widowed. They've got the same problem. It is difficult for them and we're doing what we can to make singles feel more at home. But in the eternities the family relationship is the thing that we're most interested in. But we don't condemn the person who's single now. We say, work for that destiny." {{ref|oaks86}}

Critics also argue that being single is an additional burden for gay people who wish to remain faithful in the church. Elder Oaks responds "Every person who is single who has a sex drive and is not able to satisfy that outside the bonds of marriage with out being in transgression is carrying a burden. That burden is carried by homosexuals and it's carried by heterosexuals. It's a lesser burden for a person who does not have such a strong sex drive. But it's a burden in any event, and it's not unique to the homosexual." {{ref|oaks86}}

Celibacy is required for all single people, no matter what reason they give for not being able to get married. Both gay and straight people have been able to find joy and happiness in single life.

=== Controlling homosexual feelings ===

In a 2007 interview, Elder Oaks taught "Homosexual feelings are controllable. Perhaps there is an inclination or susceptibility to such feelings that is a reality for some and not a reality for others. But out of such susceptibilities come feelings, and feelings are controllable."{{ref|oaks07}}

Critics of the church argue that teaching that members should control homosexual feelings goes beyond asking members to control their behavior. They argue that being gay means having homosexual feelings, and by not accepting homosexual feelings, the church in reality is not accepting gay people.

The church does not just ask members to control homosexual feelings, but all feelings, including heterosexual feelings. It is important not to misinterpret Elder Oaks. He is not saying that homosexual feelings are chosen, but that they must be controlled even if one did not chose to have them in the first place.{{ref|oaks95}} The church teaches all member that they should "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage." This includes a commandment for all unmarried people to "control our thoughts" and "not participate in conversations or activities that arouse sexual feelings, such as passionate kissing, lying with or on top of another person, or touching the private, sacred parts of another person's body, with or without clothing."{{ref|chastity}} The commandment for unmarried people not to "arouse sexual feelings" applies equally to gay and straight people.

Elder Oaks said "Jesus taught that to look on a woman and lust after her is a sin. And everyone is encouraged to control their feelings, heterosexual or homosexual. That's part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. People who act out those feelings, whether they're homosexual or heterosexual, are in danger of Church discipline. The Church discourages them, calls them to repentance, works with them, counsels them and ultimately disciplines them if necessary." {{ref|oaks86}} Surely, it would be just as natural for a straight man to have heterosexual feelings for a woman as it is for a gay person to have homosexual feelings for someone of the same sex, but both have been commanded to learn to control their sexual feelings.

== Homosexual problems ==
While discussing homosexuality on an interview with Larry King, President Hinckley said that "Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them. We know they have a problem. We want to help them solve that problem."{{ref|larryking04}} Critics of the church argue that by saying that gay people have problems, the church places a stigma on them.

It is important to understand exactly what homosexual problems are. It is more than simply having a homosexual orientation. A 1992 publication by the Church gives the following definition of homosexual problems: "Homosexual problems include erotic thoughts, feelings, and behavior directed toward persons of the same sex."{{ref|lds92}} The Church teaches both gay and straight members to "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage".{{ref|chastity}} Gay people are not the only ones that have erotic thoughts, feelings, and behaviors outside of marriage. Elder Nelson explains that "Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

In an interview about same-sex attraction, Elder Oaks responded to an interviewer's question about homosexuality: "Everyone has some challenges they have to struggle with. You’ve described a particular kind of challenge that is very vexing. It is common in our society and it has also become politicized. But it’s only one of a host of challenges men and women have to struggle with."

Like straight people, gay people also have problems, and depend upon the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ. That is the basis of the Church's belief, and there is no reason to suppose why it would be any different for gay people.
The church does ask a lot of its gay members, but a lot is asked of straight members as well. The counsel of the church to gay members might seem harsh to those unfamiliar with the counsel given to the membership of the church in general. The follow chart compares some of the counsel given to gay members versus that given to the general membership of the church.

== Inappropriate sexual advances ==
In October General Conference of 1976, Elder Packer gave a speech on morality in the priesthood session. In it, he talks about homosexuality and encourages young men to "vigorously resist" any males "who entice young men to join them in these immoral acts." He tells of a missionary who was concerned when he had "floored" his companion for making unwanted advances on him. He told the missionary, "Well, thanks. Somebody had to do it, and it wouldn't be well for a General Authority to solve the problem that way." He then recounts, "I am not recommending that course to you, but I am not omitting it. You must protect yourself." This was later published and distributed in a pamphlet called "To Young Men Only".{{ref|packer76}}

Dr. Quinn argues that by counting this story, Elder Packer is endorsing a form of gay-bashing, and that by republishing the story, the church itself endorses gay-bashing.{{ref|quinn}}

It is doubtful that Elder Packer was approving of gay bashing. He was probably condemning inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the gender or sexual orientation of the perpetrator. Earlier he had taught: "Never let anyone handle you or touch those very personal parts of your body which are an essential link in the ongoing of creation."{{ref|packer72}} His language against gey people who make inappropriate sexual advances was no different than against straight people who likewise make inappropriate sexual advances. He is no more endorsing gay-bashing then straight-bashing. Later, in response to accusations that the church rejects gay people, he answered "We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior."{{ref|packer01}} By looking at these two quotes, it becomes apparent that Elder Packer does not reject gay people, but only rejects the behavior of making inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the sexual orientation.

== Old Intro ==
LGBT people are welcome in the church, and are affirmed as good people. The leaderships of the church has unanimously expressed love to gay people. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is not anti-gay but is infact an LGBT welcoming and affirming church. Most of the accusations of the church being anti-gay centers around a few misunderstandings:

1) You can't be affirming of LGBT
Is being gay a sin?-affirming
Does BYU allow gay students? - welcoming
Are homosexuals an abomination? - affirming
Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? - affirming
Does the Church support aversion therapy? - afirming
Doesn't the church's teachings on same-sex relationships interfer with its teachings on agency?
Causes of Homosexuality

There was a Georgia Tech gay rights manual that referred to the church as anti-gay. However, a judge ordered that the material be removed because there was no basis for the accusation.(http://www.wrcbtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=8258001 Judge rules Georgia Tech gay rights manual biased". Associated Press. May 1, 200) President Hinckley told Larry King in an interview that the church was not anti-gay.

==Isn't the church anti-gay if it teaches against same-sex relationship? ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships outside of a marriage between a man and a woman. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Elder Packer explains:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

Many people have a hard distinguishing between sexual orientation and sexual activity. They often think a reject of homosexual practices is a rejection of people with a homosexual orientation.

Many people unfamiliar with homosexuality will often lump people with same-sex attractions, people who have sexual relations with people of the same gender, and people

Not all gay people want to pursue same-sex relationships. The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States

According to some book, only a small percentage of people with same-sex attractions have participated in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} There are also several accounts of those who had participated in homosexual behavior who have since abandoned the practice or are seeking to. One survey indicated that 20% of gay men and 40% of lesbians are married to someone of the opposite sex. This puts estimates at some number. According to this one study, this segment of the population is often overlooked. While these people may not be as vocal as the other segments of the gay and lesbian population, it is an important segment and their views should not be discounted.

Is the Church anti-gay?

President Hinckley said the Church wasn't anti-gay, but pro-family.{{ref|larryking04}} The Church has spoken out against gay-bashing or any type of hostility towards gay people. Elder Oaks reminded members that people who are attracted to the same gender are in "special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members".{{ref|oaks95}} Many gay members of the Church have expressed their gratitude for the Church's stance on homosexuality.

Newline.

A Georgia Tech manual labeled the Mormon Church as anti-gay, but a complaint was made, and a judge sided with the students and mandated that the reference to the Mormon church being anti-gay be removed.

This may or may not relate to their actual sexual orientation. In a 1990 study by the Social Organization of Sexuality, only 16% of women and 36% of men who reported some level of same-sex attraction had a homosexual or bisexual identity. The same survey found that 96% of women and 87% of men with a homosexual or bisexual identity had participated in sex with someone of the same sex, as contrasted to 32% of women and 43% of men who had same-sex attractions. According to a 1990 study of The Social Organization of Sexuality, out of 131 women and 108 men who self-reported [[same-sex attraction]], only 43 men (40%) and 42 women (32%) had participated in gay sex. {{ref|laumann}}

Given recent prevalence estimates most pastoral caregivers and counselors will work with persons who experience same-sex attraction (SSA). Many of the people who experience SSA will report such a consistency in the directionality and intensity of their attractions that they think of themselves as having a homosexual orientation. Others will integrate their experiences of SSA into a gay identity. What can facilitate pastoral care and counseling is an intentional use of this three-tier distinction: experiences of SSA, homosexual orientation, and gay identity. A discussion of this three-tier distinction is followed by specific suggestions for utilizing this conceptual framework as a resource in pastoral care and counseling.{{ref|yarhouse}}

When homosexual attraction, homosexual identity, and same-sex sexual behavior were entered to predict suicide attempt, only same-sex sexual behavior was significantly predictive.{{ref|suicide}}

== Is being gay a sin? ==

No. Elder Oaks taught "It’s no sin to have inclinations that if yielded to would produce behavior that would be a transgression. The sin is in yielding to temptation. Temptation is not unique. Even the Savior was tempted." {{ref|oaks07}} The pamphlet "God Loveth His Children" encourages gay members to neither blame themselves nor their parents for their attractions.{{ref|GodLoveth}}

==Does BYU allow gay students? ==

Yes. Sexual orientation was never an honor code issue, but in 2008 the honor code was revised to specifically state "Sexual orientation is not an honor code issue." Outside groups, including Soulforce, have criticized BYU's policy against same-sex relationships, but gay students who go to BYU have spoken in favor of BYU's honor code.

==Are homosexuals an abomination? ==

The previous version of the For the Strength of the Youth pamphlet included the phrase "Homosexuality is an abomination". At the time of publication, homosexuality referred to sexual relations between people of the same gender. Now homosexuality is considered a sexual orientation, which may not be related to a person's sexual practices. The Church considers all sexual relationships except those between a husband and a wife as an abomination. (Alma 39:5) The abomination is the sexual act, not the person committing it. In his book, Miracle of Forgiveness, Elder Kimball said he believes many homosexuals are "basically good people who have become trapped in sin," referring to those who were having same-sex relationships.{{ref|miracle}}

==Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? ==

No. Elder Holland taught "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all... Perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

In 1987, President Hinckley taught "Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices."{{ref|hinckley87}} In 1992, the Church came out with more elaborate instructions. "Marriage should not be viewed as a way to resolve homosexual problems. The lives of others should not be damaged by entering a marriage where such concerns exist. Encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement. However, some people have reported that once they are freed from homosexual problems, heterosexual feelings have gradually emerged."{{ref|lds92}}

Again in 2007, Elder Oaks commented on President Hinckley's 1987 statement: "To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. On the other hand, persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity - that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

While there is no requirement nor encouragement for gay people to marry, there is no restriction either. Elder Holland notes "Some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."{{ref|holland07}} Many members with same-sex attraction are faithfully married, and have reported happiness and fulfillment in these marriages.

== Does the Church support aversion therapy? ==

Elder Oaks answered this question in a 2007 interview. He said:

"The Church rarely takes a position on which treatment techniques are appropriate, for medical doctors or for psychiatrists or psychologists and so on.

The second point is that there are abusive practices that have been used in connection with various mental attitudes or feelings. Over-medication in respect to depression is an example that comes to mind. The aversive therapies that have been used in connection with same-sex attraction have contained some serious abuses that have been recognized over time within the professions. While we have no position about what the medical doctors do (except in very, very rare cases - abortion would be such an example), we are conscious that there are abuses and we don’t accept responsibility for those abuses. Even though they are addressed at helping people we would like to see helped, we can’t endorse every kind of technique that’s been used."{{ref|oaks07}}

There were experiments done on aversion therapy at Brigham Young University by McBride in the 1970s.{{ref|McBride}} Although Brigham Young University is owned by the Church, it is still given a great degree of autonomy, and graduate students typically do not seek for church approval before conducting research projects. At the time, homosexuality was considered a mental disorder, and aversion therapy was a standard tool used in the medical profession to treat homosexuality.

==Endnotes==
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#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-12T18:23:51Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church Helps People */ better reflection of the source

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. No teaching and no commandment conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the Church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn" and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort" (Mosiah 18:9). This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender. {{ref|oaks95}}.

Our Church welcomes all those seeking God and His will, including those with same-gender attraction. The Gospel of Jesus Christ has the power to bring all people peace, generate hope, and nourish life-changing faith. This can lead to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come.

==The Church Welcomes All People==

The Church invites all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to those struggling with same-sex attraction. In 1999 he made the following statement:
<blockquote>
"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}
</blockquote>
The Church has developed several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attraction. The most recent, ''God Loveth His Children'', assures that
<blockquote>
"No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}}
</blockquote>

Elder Oaks similarly stated:
<blockquote>
"Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95-2}}
</blockquote>

Many with same-sex attraction are faithful members of the Church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members:

*[http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International]
*[http://northstarlds.org North Star]
*[http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]

LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who are attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}} and in several books published by Church members. General Authorities attend these meetings and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes all those who seek to live according to God's commandments, including those with same-sex attraction.

==The Church Loves Those with Same-Sex Attraction==

The Church teaches that those who struggle with same-sex attraction are beloved sons and daughters of God and are loved by the Church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the Church. In one of the Church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}} President Hinckley followed suit and repeated his love{{ref|hinckley98}} and has affirmed that Church members with same-sex attraction are good people.{{ref|lattin}}

These expressions of love have also been extended to those with same-sex attraction who do not keep the standards of the Church. In the ''Miracle of Forgiveness,'' Spencer W. Kimball said that he found that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The Church always strives to adequately express God's love for all people, including those who struggle with same-sex attraction, and their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a man who came to him with a question. The man worried that because he was attracted to other men, he couldn't continue being a member of the Church. Elder Holland reiterated his love for this man and stressed that such feelings did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. After recounting the story, he tells of another man with same-sex attraction who was faithful in the Church. Of him, Elder Holland said, "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who 'fight the good fight' (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with—or who are helping others who struggle with—same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

The Church has instructed leaders of the Church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior."{{ref|lds92}}

== The Church Helps People ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help those who struggle with same-sex attraction. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks by saying "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|hinckley98-2}}

There are many ways in which the Church helps those with same-sex attraction. For example, the Church has advocated employment and housing rights for all people, regardless of their sexual orientation. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on an ordinance which would protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure. In the official statement, they said it was a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done even though the Utah legislature, at the time, was against extending such rights.

Beyond advocating such legal protections, the Church has also sought to protect gays from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"—physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95-2}}

The Church helps those with same-sex attraction by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|holland07-2}} The leadership has warned against aversive therapies that have been used on gay people which have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field.{{ref|oaks07}} They have spoken out against using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have warned leaders that "encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement."{{ref|lds92-2}} They have assured members that same-sex attraction is not a sin{{ref|oaks07-2}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised His children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|holland07-3}}

=== The Church Helps the Families of Those with Same-Sex Attraction ===

One of the best services that we can perform for our brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions. One way to accomplish this is by supporting their families. We should encourage family members to love and reach out to family members who struggle with same-sex attraction, regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled:
<blockquote>
"If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent."{{ref|lds92-3}}
</blockquote>

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997:
<blockquote>
"Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues."{{ref|oaks07-3}}
</blockquote>

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} The sister of a woman struggling with same-sex attraction wrote an ''Ensign'' article in which she describes how the Church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh).
<blockquote>
"I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love."{{ref|Leigh}}
</blockquote>

=== The Church Helps People Find Peace ===

The mission of the Church is to invite all unto Christ. We believe this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our brothers and sisters. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us His name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey His commandments. Teaching and encouraging our brothers and sisters to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our brothers and sisters, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides those between a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if people do not follow the law of chastity:
<blockquote>
"Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}}
</blockquote>

Elder Oaks teaches there are two approaches to deal with guilt. We believe our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel when they break the commandments of God.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code the Church rejects people—including those who engage in homosexual practices—who choose to not follow this law. Elder Packer responded to this concern by saying:
<blockquote>
"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy."{{ref|packer01}}
</blockquote>

There are many gay members of the Church who want to live this higher moral code and find that the teachings of the Church are encouraging. This is one of the reasons why the Church teaches that those with same-sex attraction must abstain from homosexual relationships. Elder Wickman explains:
<blockquote>
"One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}
</blockquote>

=== The Church Helps People by Empowering Them ===

We believe that peace comes through obeying the Gospel of Jesus Christ. We believe all people are capable of obeying the commandments of God (1 Nephi 3:7). Unfortunately, people are often told they are incapable of obeying the commandments of God, that they are "too hard" or somehow "unfair." This limits their capabilities and prevents them from obtaining the peace that comes through obedience. By ensuring people that they are capable of obedience, we empower them to make their own decision. This enables them to chose whether or not to obey the commandments of God.

Many believe that people with same-sex attraction are incapable of abstaining from same-sex relationships, which by extension means they are incapable of obeying God's commandments. They preach a belief that those attracted to the same sex are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex." This choice, according to the court, is one "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth."{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They leave no room for those with same-sex attraction to make a decision that would be in harmony with gospel, which by extension implies that such people were born to disobey God. This thought is very harmful. Individuals struggling with same-sex attraction may come to believe that they have no power over their sexual urges and the only choice is to act on them. Those who do not want to pursue same-sex relationships are told that option is not available to them. This can cause them to feel trapped and bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves" (Helaman 14:30). While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we also teach that all are free to chose good or evil. We uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own conscience (AoF 12) and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values (D&C 134:2). The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts from God. If a person is told and comes to believe that they are incapable of following the commandments of God, they they do not truly have the ability to chose for themselves; they have lost their agency. This is not God's plan for His children.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth-2}}

While other organizations say that those with same-gender attraction are ultimately incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers such people. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny and they can make of their life what they want.

Much of this argument is based under the belief that the Church is true and that same-sex relationships are against the will of the Lord. Whether one agrees with that premise or not, that is the assumption that we are operating under. The Church has no intention other than to bring people unto Christ and empower them to live a life in harmony with God's commandments. Directing his comments to those who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives—the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}} We are a welcoming and empowering church for our brothers and sisters who struggle with same-sex attraction.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|oaks95-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|holland07}} {{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|Oaks95}}[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|hinckley98-2}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|Oaks95-2}}#[http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|holland07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|lds92-2}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-2}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|holland07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds92-3}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|oaks07-3}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|oaks86}} {{attn}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|GodLoveth-2}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]

#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-08T19:45:35Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The Church welcomes gay people */ Gay and lesbian should not be used as a noun, except when quoting the source, per Elder Oak's request.

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships

2010-02-08T19:39:08Z

JoshuaJohanson:

LDS Family Services:

Homosexuality is defined as any kind of erotic thoughts, feelings, or behaviors towards persons of the same sex. Those who experience same-gender sexual thoughts or feelings often struggle to resist the temptation to act on such thoughts and feelings. It is important to recognize the difference between same-gender sexual feelings and behaviors.

Elder Dallin H. Oaks stated: “We should always distinguish between sinful acts and inappropriate feelings or potentially dangerous susceptibilities. We should reach out lovingly to those who are struggling to resist temptation. The First Presidency did this in their 14 November 1991 letter. After reaffirming the sinful nature of ‘fornication, adultery, and homosexual and lesbian behavior,’ the Presidency added:

“Individuals and their families desiring help with these matters should seek counsel from their bishop, branch president, stake or district president. We encourage Church leaders and members to reach out with love and understanding to those struggling with these issues. Many will respond to Christlike love and inspired counsel as they receive an invitation to come back and apply the atoning and healing power of the Savior. (See Isa. 53:4-5; Mosiah 4:2-3.)” (Ensign, Oct. 1995, 7 14). [http://www.providentliving.org/ses/emotionalhealth/0,12283,2130-1---59,00.html]

Some feel that the church's stance on same-sex relationships is harmful to people with same-sex attractions. They argue that a gay person's sexual orientation is innate and immutable, that it is unreasonable to ask them not to seek out homosexual relationships, and that repressing these attractions has a severe negative impact on a person's well-being. They teach that pursuing same-sex relationships is the only way for gay people to be well adjusted, and any teaching to the contrary is damaging to a gay person's well-being.

== Discrepancy between same-sex relationships and same-sex attraction ==

While it is true that most people have little or no choice over their sexual orientation{{ref|apa1}}, it is not true that one's sexual orientation dictates one's sexual behavior, nor one's sexual identity. These three areas are not as highly coordinated as one might think. Studies in the area show significant discrepancies between orientation, behavior and identity. The American Psychological Association clarifies: "Sexual orientation is different from sexual behavior because it refers to feelings and self-concept. Individuals may or may not express their sexual orientation in their behaviors."{{ref|apa1}}

One of the most comprehensive studies in the United States was done by the Social Organization of Sexuality. They found that out of 131 women and 108 men in their survey who self-reported same-sex attraction, only 43 men (40%) and 42 women (32%) had a homosexual experience. {{ref|laumann}}

The large discrepancies between sexual orientation, identity and behavior is one of the reasons why it is difficult to get accurate measures on people who deal with homosexuality. While the numbers vary from one study to the next, the numbers consistently show that there are significantly more people with same-sex attractions than those who have had a homosexual experience. That would indicate that the teachings of the church on same-sex relationships is consistent with the practices of a significant number of people with same-sex attractions.

=== Fluidity of sexuality ===

In addition to the population that have never had a homosexual experience, there are also people who have stopped or will stop having homosexual relationships, some of whom have also reported that they have no current attraction to the same sex. The study indicated that of the 4.9% of men and 4.1% of women who have ever had a homosexual experience since the age of 18, only 2.7% of men and 1.3% of women had one in the last year. This means that most people who have participated have already stopped. From these, and other findings, the American Psychiatric Association concluded "some people believe that sexual orientation is innate and fixed; however, sexual orientation develops across a person’s lifetime". {{ref|apa2000}}

This might not follow the impression that most people have about gay people. Looking deeper into the survey might indicate why. The same survey found that 96% of women and 87% of men with a homosexual or bisexual identity have had sex with someone of the same sex. This indicates that the sexual behaviors of openly gay people are not reflective of the gay population at large. Because openly gay people are more open about their sexual orientation and behaviors, this has led many people to incorrectly believe that their sexual behaviors are reflective of the larger gay population. This misconception has lead many to believe that gay people either cannot or do not want to live a lifestyle that is consistent with the church's teaching. However, evidence indicates a sizable number already do or will sometime in the future.

=== Rejecting a gay identity ===

Most of the people with same-sex attractions who have not had a homosexual experience also do not identity as gay. Critics argue that it is not healthy for homosexual people to reject a gay identity or suppress their homosexual attractions. They argue that the only way to be well-adjusted is to come out as a gay person. There is a significant movement to try to "out" people who reject a gay identity,{{ref|outrage}} and there are massive protests at any organization that seeks to help people with same-sex attractions that do not accept the gay identity.{{ref|two}}

Because of the massive opposition to people who want to reject a gay identity, a task force set up by the APA investigated the matter. They found that there is no clear harm in denying a gay identity. They found that for some people, a religious identity was stronger than their sexual identity, and instructed counselors not to preclude the goal of celibacy, but to help clients determine their own goals in therapy, and that together with support groups, the therapy can change a client's sexual orientation identity. Dr. Glassgold, the leader of the taskforce, summarized the findings by saying that there has been little research about the long-term effects of rejecting a gay identity, but there is "no clear evidence of harm" and "some people seem to be content with that path."{{ref|simon}}

Although there is no harm in denying a gay identity, the church does not require gay members to deny their sexual orientation. What is required is members follow the law of chastity. Elder Wickman teaches that sexual orientation is a core element of one's identity, but not the only one.{{ref|oaks07}} All members of the church have made a covenant to take upon themselves the name of Christ. For members of the Church, taking upon themselves the name of Christ supersedes all other identities, whether gay or straight.

Obviously there is a strong relationship between being gay and having same-sex relationships. There is also a strong relationship between being straight and having a child out of wedlock, which the church also teaches against. However, it is neither unreasonable nor unhealthy for a gay person to follow the church's law of chastity, just like it is neither unreasonable nor unhealthy for a straight person to follow it. Both homosexuality and heterosexuality are natural variations of human sexuality,{{ref|apa}} but in order to become a saint of the latter-days, one must put off the natural man, and submit to the enticings of the Holy Ghost. (Mosiah 3:18) Latter-day saints are asked to serve God, which precludes serving one's own sexual desires, be it gay or straight. It is a sacrifice for both gay and straight people to put off the natural man and serve God, but Joseph Smith teaches that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary to achieve eternal life. The promise of the gospel is peace in this life and eternal life in the next, and that is the greatest gift that anyone can receive, whether they be gay or straight.

== Related links ==
*[[User:InProgress/Same-sex_attraction/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|Are gay people treated differently than straight people?]]
*[[User:InProgress/Same-sex_attraction/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[User:InProgress/Same-sex_attraction/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[User:InProgress/Same-sex_attraction]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|apa2000}}[http://www.aglp.org/pages/cfactsheets.html#Anchor-Gay-14210 American Psychiatric Association] 2000
#{{note|apa}}[http://www.apahelpcenter.org/articles/article.php?id=31 American Psychological Association Help Center] Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality
#{{note|apa2007}}[http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbc/publications/therapeutic-response.pdf Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation]
#{{note|beckstead}}{{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }}
#{{note|honorcode}}{{Citation
|author=Brigham Young University
|author-link=Brigham Young University
|title=The Honor Code and Applications: Live a Chaste and Virtuous Life
|publisher=Brigham Young University
|place=Provo, Utah
|url=http://honorcode.byu.edu/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3599&Itemid=4643
}}.
#{{note|aversiontherapy}}{{Citation |url= http://www.glbtq.com/social-sciences/aversion_therapy.html |title= Aversion Therapy |publisher= glptq.com |accessdate= [[2007-12-20]] }}
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|nytstyle}}[http://www.glaad.org/Page.aspx?pid=380 AP, The New York Times & Washington Post Style]
#{{note|Norway}} Hegna K, Larsen CJ. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17364711?ordinalpos=6&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Straightening out the queer? Same-sex experience and attraction among young people in Norway.]
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#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
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#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
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}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
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#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|quinn}}D. Michael Quinn, [http://www.affirmation.org/learning/prelude.shtml "Prelude to the National 'Defense of Marriage' Campaign: Civil Discrimination Against Feared or Despised Minorities"], ''[[Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought]]'', '''33''':3, p. 1-52 (2001)
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|simon}}STEPHANIE SIMON [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html#articleTabs%3Darticle A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity : Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|snow}}{{Citation
|last=Snow
|first=Lorenzo
|author-link=Lorenzo Snow
|periodical=Millennial Star
|date=August 31 1899
|pages=547
}}.
#{{note|Savin-Williams}} Savin-Williams RC, Ream GL. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17195103?ordinalpos=7&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Prevalence and stability of sexual orientation components during adolescence and young adulthood.]
#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|two}}[http://www.truthwinsout.org Truth Wins Out]
#{{note|outrage}}[http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=103875747 White-Hot 'Outrage' Over The Capitol Hill Closet]
#{{note|GayMormonMarried}} [http://www.rickross.com/reference/mormon/mormon336.html Gay, Mormon, Married]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction/Myths about the Church and homosexuality

2010-02-08T18:32:45Z

JoshuaJohanson:

== Higher standard ==
Some critics argue that while both gay and straight members must obey the church's law of chastity, gay members are discriminated against because they are expected to live a higher standard. They argue that the teaching that gay people must control homosexual feelings is unrealistic. They argue that the law of chastity is discriminatory because straight members can find companionship and fulfillment through marriage, while gay members cannot because the church does not recognize same-sex marriages.

=== Opportunity for marriage ===

While same-sex attraction is most definitely an obstacle in creating a fulfilling marriage, it is not a barrier. To say that gay people cannot find fulfillment in marriage is extreme. One study indicated that 20% of gay men are currently married to a woman, some of whom find their marriages to be fulfilling.{{ref|moore}}{{ref|GayMormonMarried}} Fulfillment in marriage is not solely based on sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is not solely based on sexual orientation. While many gay people do not want to marry, others do develop a love for an opposite-sex partner and go on to have a fulfilling marriage. Sexual orientation is only small part in sexual attraction, and sexual attraction is only a small part in marital fulfillment.

Marriage may not be the appropriate course of action for everyone, and the Church has warned against entering into a marriage before one is ready. However, there are circumstances in which the church supports marriage for gay people. Elder Oaks explains:

"Persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity — that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

=== Pressure to get married ===

=== Being single in a family-centered church ===

Critics argue that gay people who chose to be celibate can never really be accepted in a church which is so focused on the family. While some gay people may have a fulfilling marriage, there are many gay members of the church for whom marriage is not a realistic option. Elder Holland teaches "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all. Perhaps no offer of marriage is forthcoming. Perhaps even after marriage there is an inability to have children. Or perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

It is true that having same-sex attractions presents an additional challenge for gay members to find fulfillment in a marriage which straight members do not have to deal with. However, gay people are not the only ones who have a challenge in forming a fulfilling marriage. Elder Oaks explains: "That's not a unique problem to homosexuals. One of the largest demographic problems we have in the Church are single women, divorced, never married, widowed. They've got the same problem. It is difficult for them and we're doing what we can to make singles feel more at home. But in the eternities the family relationship is the thing that we're most interested in. But we don't condemn the person who's single now. We say, work for that destiny." {{ref|oaks86}}

Critics also argue that being single is an additional burden for gay people who wish to remain faithful in the church. Elder Oaks responds "Every person who is single who has a sex drive and is not able to satisfy that outside the bonds of marriage with out being in transgression is carrying a burden. That burden is carried by homosexuals and it's carried by heterosexuals. It's a lesser burden for a person who does not have such a strong sex drive. But it's a burden in any event, and it's not unique to the homosexual." {{ref|oaks86}}

Celibacy is required for all single people, no matter what reason they give for not being able to get married. Both gay and straight people have been able to find joy and happiness in single life.

=== Controlling homosexual feelings ===

In a 2007 interview, Elder Oaks taught "Homosexual feelings are controllable. Perhaps there is an inclination or susceptibility to such feelings that is a reality for some and not a reality for others. But out of such susceptibilities come feelings, and feelings are controllable."{{ref|oaks07}}

Critics of the church argue that teaching that members should control homosexual feelings goes beyond asking members to control their behavior. They argue that being gay means having homosexual feelings, and by not accepting homosexual feelings, the church in reality is not accepting gay people.

The church does not just ask members to control homosexual feelings, but all feelings, including heterosexual feelings. It is important not to misinterpret Elder Oaks. He is not saying that homosexual feelings are chosen, but that they must be controlled even if one did not chose to have them in the first place.{{ref|oaks95}} The church teaches all member that they should "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage." This includes a commandment for all unmarried people to "control our thoughts" and "not participate in conversations or activities that arouse sexual feelings, such as passionate kissing, lying with or on top of another person, or touching the private, sacred parts of another person's body, with or without clothing."{{ref|chastity}} The commandment for unmarried people not to "arouse sexual feelings" applies equally to gay and straight people.

Elder Oaks said "Jesus taught that to look on a woman and lust after her is a sin. And everyone is encouraged to control their feelings, heterosexual or homosexual. That's part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. People who act out those feelings, whether they're homosexual or heterosexual, are in danger of Church discipline. The Church discourages them, calls them to repentance, works with them, counsels them and ultimately disciplines them if necessary." {{ref|oaks86}} Surely, it would be just as natural for a straight man to have heterosexual feelings for a woman as it is for a gay person to have homosexual feelings for someone of the same sex, but both have been commanded to learn to control their sexual feelings.

== Homosexual problems ==
While discussing homosexuality on an interview with Larry King, President Hinckley said that "Well, we're not anti-gay. We are pro-family. Let me put it that way. And we love these people and try to work with them and help them. We know they have a problem. We want to help them solve that problem."{{ref|larryking04}} Critics of the church argue that by saying that gay people have problems, the church places a stigma on them.

It is important to understand exactly what homosexual problems are. It is more than simply having a homosexual orientation. A 1992 publication by the Church gives the following definition of homosexual problems: "Homosexual problems include erotic thoughts, feelings, and behavior directed toward persons of the same sex."{{ref|lds92}} The Church teaches both gay and straight members to "never do anything outside of marriage to arouse the powerful emotions that must be expressed only in marriage".{{ref|chastity}} Gay people are not the only ones that have erotic thoughts, feelings, and behaviors outside of marriage. Elder Nelson explains that "Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

In an interview about same-sex attraction, Elder Oaks responded to an interviewer's question about homosexuality: "Everyone has some challenges they have to struggle with. You’ve described a particular kind of challenge that is very vexing. It is common in our society and it has also become politicized. But it’s only one of a host of challenges men and women have to struggle with."

Like straight people, gay people also have problems, and depend upon the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ. That is the basis of the Church's belief, and there is no reason to suppose why it would be any different for gay people.
The church does ask a lot of its gay members, but a lot is asked of straight members as well. The counsel of the church to gay members might seem harsh to those unfamiliar with the counsel given to the membership of the church in general. The follow chart compares some of the counsel given to gay members versus that given to the general membership of the church.

== Inappropriate sexual advances ==
In October General Conference of 1976, Elder Packer gave a speech on morality in the priesthood session. In it, he talks about homosexuality and encourages young men to "vigorously resist" any males "who entice young men to join them in these immoral acts." He tells of a missionary who was concerned when he had "floored" his companion for making unwanted advances on him. He told the missionary, "Well, thanks. Somebody had to do it, and it wouldn't be well for a General Authority to solve the problem that way." He then recounts, "I am not recommending that course to you, but I am not omitting it. You must protect yourself." This was later published and distributed in a pamphlet called "To Young Men Only".{{ref|packer76}}

Dr. Quinn argues that by counting this story, Elder Packer is endorsing a form of gay-bashing, and that by republishing the story, the church itself endorses gay-bashing.{{ref|quinn}}

It is doubtful that Elder Packer was approving of gay bashing. He was probably condemning inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the gender or sexual orientation of the perpetrator. Earlier he had taught: "Never let anyone handle you or touch those very personal parts of your body which are an essential link in the ongoing of creation."{{ref|packer72}} His language against gey people who make inappropriate sexual advances was no different than against straight people who likewise make inappropriate sexual advances. He is no more endorsing gay-bashing then straight-bashing. Later, in response to accusations that the church rejects gay people, he answered "We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior."{{ref|packer01}} By looking at these two quotes, it becomes apparent that Elder Packer does not reject gay people, but only rejects the behavior of making inappropriate sexual advances, regardless of the sexual orientation.

== Old Intro ==
LGBT people are welcome in the church, and are affirmed as good people. The leaderships of the church has unanimously expressed love to gay people. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is not anti-gay but is infact an LGBT welcoming and affirming church. Most of the accusations of the church being anti-gay centers around a few misunderstandings:

1) You can't be affirming of LGBT
Is being gay a sin?-affirming
Does BYU allow gay students? - welcoming
Are homosexuals an abomination? - affirming
Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? - affirming
Does the Church support aversion therapy? - afirming
Doesn't the church's teachings on same-sex relationships interfer with its teachings on agency?
Causes of Homosexuality

There was a Georgia Tech gay rights manual that referred to the church as anti-gay. However, a judge ordered that the material be removed because there was no basis for the accusation.(http://www.wrcbtv.com/Global/story.asp?S=8258001 Judge rules Georgia Tech gay rights manual biased". Associated Press. May 1, 200) President Hinckley told Larry King in an interview that the church was not anti-gay.

==Isn't the church anti-gay if it teaches against same-sex relationship? ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships outside of a marriage between a man and a woman. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. Elder Packer explains:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

Many people have a hard distinguishing between sexual orientation and sexual activity. They often think a reject of homosexual practices is a rejection of people with a homosexual orientation.

Many people unfamiliar with homosexuality will often lump people with same-sex attractions, people who have sexual relations with people of the same gender, and people

Not all gay people want to pursue same-sex relationships. The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States

According to some book, only a small percentage of people with same-sex attractions have participated in homosexual behavior.{{ref|laumann}} There are also several accounts of those who had participated in homosexual behavior who have since abandoned the practice or are seeking to. One survey indicated that 20% of gay men and 40% of lesbians are married to someone of the opposite sex. This puts estimates at some number. According to this one study, this segment of the population is often overlooked. While these people may not be as vocal as the other segments of the gay and lesbian population, it is an important segment and their views should not be discounted.

Is the Church anti-gay?

President Hinckley said the Church wasn't anti-gay, but pro-family.{{ref|larryking04}} The Church has spoken out against gay-bashing or any type of hostility towards gay people. Elder Oaks reminded members that people who are attracted to the same gender are in "special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members".{{ref|oaks95}} Many gay members of the Church have expressed their gratitude for the Church's stance on homosexuality.

Newline.

A Georgia Tech manual labeled the Mormon Church as anti-gay, but a complaint was made, and a judge sided with the students and mandated that the reference to the Mormon church being anti-gay be removed.

This may or may not relate to their actual sexual orientation. In a 1990 study by the Social Organization of Sexuality, only 16% of women and 36% of men who reported some level of same-sex attraction had a homosexual or bisexual identity. The same survey found that 96% of women and 87% of men with a homosexual or bisexual identity had participated in sex with someone of the same sex, as contrasted to 32% of women and 43% of men who had same-sex attractions. According to a 1990 study of The Social Organization of Sexuality, out of 131 women and 108 men who self-reported [[same-sex attraction]], only 43 men (40%) and 42 women (32%) had participated in gay sex. {{ref|laumann}}

Given recent prevalence estimates most pastoral caregivers and counselors will work with persons who experience same-sex attraction (SSA). Many of the people who experience SSA will report such a consistency in the directionality and intensity of their attractions that they think of themselves as having a homosexual orientation. Others will integrate their experiences of SSA into a gay identity. What can facilitate pastoral care and counseling is an intentional use of this three-tier distinction: experiences of SSA, homosexual orientation, and gay identity. A discussion of this three-tier distinction is followed by specific suggestions for utilizing this conceptual framework as a resource in pastoral care and counseling.{{ref|yarhouse}}

When homosexual attraction, homosexual identity, and same-sex sexual behavior were entered to predict suicide attempt, only same-sex sexual behavior was significantly predictive.{{ref|suicide}}

== Is being gay a sin? ==

No. Elder Oaks taught "It’s no sin to have inclinations that if yielded to would produce behavior that would be a transgression. The sin is in yielding to temptation. Temptation is not unique. Even the Savior was tempted." {{ref|oaks07}} The pamphlet "God Loveth His Children" encourages gay members to neither blame themselves nor their parents for their attractions.{{ref|GodLoveth}}

==Does BYU allow gay students? ==

Yes. Sexual orientation was never an honor code issue, but in 2008 the honor code was revised to specifically state "Sexual orientation is not an honor code issue." Outside groups, including Soulforce, have criticized BYU's policy against same-sex relationships, but gay students who go to BYU have spoken in favor of BYU's honor code.

==Are homosexuals an abomination? ==

The previous version of the For the Strength of the Youth pamphlet included the phrase "Homosexuality is an abomination". At the time of publication, homosexuality referred to sexual relations between people of the same gender. Now homosexuality is considered a sexual orientation, which may not be related to a person's sexual practices. The Church considers all sexual relationships except those between a husband and a wife as an abomination. (Alma 39:5) The abomination is the sexual act, not the person committing it. In his book, Miracle of Forgiveness, Elder Kimball said he believes many homosexuals are "basically good people who have become trapped in sin," referring to those who were having same-sex relationships.{{ref|miracle}}

==Do gay people need to be married in order to enter into heaven? ==

No. Elder Holland taught "For various reasons, marriage and children are not immediately available to all... Perhaps there is no present attraction to the opposite gender. Whatever the reason, God’s richest blessings will eventually be available to all of His children if they are clean and faithful."{{ref|holland07}}

In 1987, President Hinckley taught "Marriage should not be viewed as a therapeutic step to solve problems such as homosexual inclinations or practices."{{ref|hinckley87}} In 1992, the Church came out with more elaborate instructions. "Marriage should not be viewed as a way to resolve homosexual problems. The lives of others should not be damaged by entering a marriage where such concerns exist. Encouraging members to cultivate heterosexual feelings as a way to resolve homosexual problems generally leads them to frustration and discouragement. However, some people have reported that once they are freed from homosexual problems, heterosexual feelings have gradually emerged."{{ref|lds92}}

Again in 2007, Elder Oaks commented on President Hinckley's 1987 statement: "To me that means that we are not going to stand still to put at risk daughters of God who would enter into such marriages under false pretenses or under a cloud unknown to them. Persons who have this kind of challenge that they cannot control could not enter marriage in good faith. On the other hand, persons who have cleansed themselves of any transgression and who have shown their ability to deal with these feelings or inclinations and put them in the background, and feel a great attraction for a daughter of God and therefore desire to enter marriage and have children and enjoy the blessings of eternity - that’s a situation when marriage would be appropriate."{{ref|oaks07}}

While there is no requirement nor encouragement for gay people to marry, there is no restriction either. Elder Holland notes "Some may overcome same-gender attraction in mortality and marry. Others, however, may never be free of same-gender attraction in this life."{{ref|holland07}} Many members with same-sex attraction are faithfully married, and have reported happiness and fulfillment in these marriages.

== Does the Church support aversion therapy? ==

Elder Oaks answered this question in a 2007 interview. He said:

"The Church rarely takes a position on which treatment techniques are appropriate, for medical doctors or for psychiatrists or psychologists and so on.

The second point is that there are abusive practices that have been used in connection with various mental attitudes or feelings. Over-medication in respect to depression is an example that comes to mind. The aversive therapies that have been used in connection with same-sex attraction have contained some serious abuses that have been recognized over time within the professions. While we have no position about what the medical doctors do (except in very, very rare cases - abortion would be such an example), we are conscious that there are abuses and we don’t accept responsibility for those abuses. Even though they are addressed at helping people we would like to see helped, we can’t endorse every kind of technique that’s been used."{{ref|oaks07}}

There were experiments done on aversion therapy at Brigham Young University by McBride in the 1970s.{{ref|McBride}} Although Brigham Young University is owned by the Church, it is still given a great degree of autonomy, and graduate students typically do not seek for church approval before conducting research projects. At the time, homosexuality was considered a mental disorder, and aversion therapy was a standard tool used in the medical profession to treat homosexuality.

==Endnotes==
#{{note|apa2000}}[http://www.aglp.org/pages/cfactsheets.html#Anchor-Gay-14210 American Psychiatric Association] 2000
#{{note|apa}}[http://www.apahelpcenter.org/articles/article.php?id=31 American Psychological Association Help Center] Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality
#{{note|apa2007}}[http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbc/publications/therapeutic-response.pdf Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation]
#{{note|beckstead}}{{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }}
#{{note|honorcode}}{{Citation
|author=Brigham Young University
|author-link=Brigham Young University
|title=The Honor Code and Applications: Live a Chaste and Virtuous Life
|publisher=Brigham Young University
|place=Provo, Utah
|url=http://honorcode.byu.edu/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=3599&Itemid=4643
}}.
#{{note|aversiontherapy}}{{Citation |url= http://www.glbtq.com/social-sciences/aversion_therapy.html |title= Aversion Therapy |publisher= glptq.com |accessdate= [[2007-12-20]] }}
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|nytstyle}}[http://www.glaad.org/Page.aspx?pid=380 AP, The New York Times & Washington Post Style]
#{{note|Norway}} Hegna K, Larsen CJ. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17364711?ordinalpos=6&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Straightening out the queer? Same-sex experience and attraction among young people in Norway.]
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#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
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}}.
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#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
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#{{note|monson08}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695250131,00.html |publisher= ''[[Deseret Morning News]]'' |date= February 4, 2008 |last= Moore |first= Carrie A. |title= Thomas S. Monson named as new LDS Church president |quote= depends on what the disagreement is. If it's an apostasy situation, that would not be appropriate. If it's something political, there is room for opinion here and there on either side. }}
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
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}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
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}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
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}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
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|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
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|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
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|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
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|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
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|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
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}}.
#{{note|quinn}}D. Michael Quinn, [http://www.affirmation.org/learning/prelude.shtml "Prelude to the National 'Defense of Marriage' Campaign: Civil Discrimination Against Feared or Despised Minorities"], ''[[Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought]]'', '''33''':3, p. 1-52 (2001)
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
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|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
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|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|simon}}STEPHANIE SIMON [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html#articleTabs%3Darticle A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity : Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
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#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
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#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]

Utilizador:InProgress

2010-02-08T18:22:45Z

JoshuaJohanson: Added a link to sub page for same-sex relationships

*[[/Website reviews|Website reviews]]
*[[/Same-sex attraction|Is the church anti-gay?]]
*[[/Same-sex_attraction/Can_the_Church_welcome_gay_people_while_teaching_against_same-sex_relationships|Same-sex relationships]]
*[[/Reinventing Lamanite Identity|Reinventing Lamanite Identity]]
*[[/Aiken|Aiken party]]
*[[/Lamanite identity|Lamanite identity]]
*[[/Tremonton apostasy|Tremonton apostasy]]
*[[/Sandbox|Sandbox]]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-05T02:34:20Z

JoshuaJohanson:

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-05T02:32:18Z

JoshuaJohanson:

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-04T16:31:57Z

JoshuaJohanson:

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-03T02:30:59Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The church helps gay people by empowering them */

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, and empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and in Deseret Book.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the church, in part because of the good news that the gospel brings for gay people.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God and as such, are loved by the church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the church. In of the church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}} President Hinckley has followed suit and repeated the love for gay people,{{ref|hinckley98}} and have affirmed the gays in the church as good people.{{ref|lattin}}

The affirmation that gay people are indeed good people are not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The church always strives to affirm gay people in our love for them, and in their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him and was worried that because he was gay, he didn't know whether he could continue being a member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed to him that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. He follows up with another story of a man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

The church has instructed leaders of the church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done despite the fact that the legislature was against these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

As a part of helping gay people live a life that will bring them peace, we also empower them to make choice that will bring peace by installing a hope that they are capable of living the commandments of God. We believe that all people have that capability. (1 Nephi 3:7)

Outside of the church, there is a prevalent belief that gay people are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex." They remove any possibility for an alternative, and declare that this was a choice "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth".{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} This thought is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they were born to disobey the commandments of God. This takes away their agency and enslaves them to their carnal desires. Those who want to put off the natural man but are told that option is not available to them may feel trapped. This can bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Some gay people have found such limitations have come in conflict with their inner desires to obey the commandments of God. Psychologists have found that instead of limiting a gay person's ability to determine the direction of their own life, that by increasing self-determination and autonomy that a psychologist can help a gay person find peace in their life.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} Instead, the American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own choices and support them in living according to their own values, even in this means changing sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without recognizing both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image".{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.{{ref|larryking04}} We are a welcoming and affirming church for our gay brothers and sisters.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-03T02:26:43Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* Endnotes */

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, and empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and in Deseret Book.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the church, in part because of the good news that the gospel brings for gay people.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God and as such, are loved by the church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the church. In of the church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}} President Hinckley has followed suit and repeated the love for gay people,{{ref|hinckley98}} and have affirmed the gays in the church as good people.{{ref|lattin}}

The affirmation that gay people are indeed good people are not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The church always strives to affirm gay people in our love for them, and in their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him and was worried that because he was gay, he didn't know whether he could continue being a member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed to him that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. He follows up with another story of a man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

The church has instructed leaders of the church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done despite the fact that the legislature was against these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

As a part of helping gay people live a life that will bring them peace, we also empower them to make choice that will bring peace by installing a hope that they are capable of living the commandments of God. We believe that all people have that capability. (1 Nephi 3:7)

Outside of the church, there is a prevalent belief that gay people are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex." They remove any possibility for an alternative, and declare that this was a choice "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth".{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} This thought is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they were born to disobey the commandments of God. This takes away their agency and enslaves them to their carnal desires. Those who want to put off the natural man but are told that option is not available to them may feel trapped. This can bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Some gay people have found such limitations have come in conflict with their inner desires to obey the commandments of God. Psychologists have found that instead of limiting a gay person's ability to determine the direction of their own life, that by increasing self-determination and autonomy that a psychologist can help a gay person find peace in their life.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} Instead, the American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own choices and support them in living according to their own values, even in this means changing sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without recognizing both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.{{note|larryking04}} We are a welcoming and affirming church for our gay brothers and sisters.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}}{{Citation
|author=American Psychological Association
|title=Report of the American Psychological Association Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation
|year=2009
|url= http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/therapeutic-response.pdf}}
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} [http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/opinions/revpub/A110449.PDF In re MARRIAGE CASES]
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title=God Loveth His Children |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} There have been several studies which have investigated the effects of gay affirmative therapies on clients whose religious values go contrary to the ideals of gay affirmative therapy. For example, see {{cite journal |url= http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/651 |title= Mormon Clients’ Experiences of Conversion Therapy |last= Beckstead |first= A. Lee |date= 2004 |volume= 32 |number= 5 |pages= 651–690 |doi= 10.1177/0011000004267555 |journal= The Counseling Psychologist }} {{cite journal
|url=http://www.drthrockmorton.com/jpcreorientation.pdf
|title=Counseling practices as they relate to ratings of helpfulness by consumers of sexual reorientation therapy
|last=Throckmorton
|first=Warren
|coauthor=Welton
|date=Winter 2005
|publisher=Journal of Psychology and Christianity
|volume=24
|number=4
|pages=332–42|format=PDF}} and {{cite journal
|last=Haldeman
|first=Douglas
|url=http://tcp.sagepub.com/cgi/content/abstract/32/5/691?ck=nck
|title=When Sexual and Religious Orientation Collide:Considerations in Working with Conflicted Same-Sex Attracted Male Clients
|publisher=The Counseling Psychologist
|volume=32
|number=5
|year=2004
|doi=10.1177/0011000004267560
|journal=The Counseling Psychologist
|pages=691}}. Each have discovered that there are gay people for whom gay affirmative therapy is not helpful. This has lead the American Psychological Associate to issue a statement which reads "Mental health professional organizations call on their members to respect a person's (client's) right to selfdetermination".[http://www.apa.org/topics/sexuality/orientation.aspx] When dealing with these gay patients, they have determined that the appropriate application of affirmative therapeutic interventions is one which "involves therapist acceptance, support, and understanding of clients and the facilitation of clients’ active coping, social support, and identity exploration and development, without imposing a specific sexual orientation identity outcome." [Report of the APA Task Force on Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbt/resources/sexual-orientation.aspx]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-02T03:46:03Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The church helps gay people by empowering them */

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, and empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and in Deseret Book.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the church, in part because of the good news that the gospel brings for gay people.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God and as such, are loved by the church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the church. In of the church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}} President Hinckley has followed suit and repeated the love for gay people,{{ref|hinckley98}} and have affirmed the gays in the church as good people.{{ref|lattin}}

The affirmation that gay people are indeed good people are not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The church always strives to affirm gay people in our love for them, and in their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him and was worried that because he was gay, he didn't know whether he could continue being a member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed to him that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. He follows up with another story of a man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

The church has instructed leaders of the church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done despite the fact that the legislature was against these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

As a part of helping gay people live a life that will bring them peace, we also empower them to make choice that will bring peace by installing a hope that they are capable of living the commandments of God. We believe that all people have that capability. (1 Nephi 3:7)

Outside of the church, there is a prevalent belief that gay people are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "choice of a life partner will, by definition, be a person of the same sex." They remove any possibility for an alternative, and declare that this was a choice "into which the class members are locked by the accident of birth".{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} This thought is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they were born to disobey the commandments of God. This takes away their agency and enslaves them to their carnal desires. Those who want to put off the natural man but are told that option is not available to them may feel trapped. This can bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Some gay people have found such limitations have come in conflict with their inner desires to obey the commandments of God. Psychologists have found that instead of limiting a gay person's ability to determine the direction of their own life, that by increasing self-determination and autonomy that a psychologist can help a gay person find peace in their life.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} Instead, the American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own choices and support them in living according to their own values, even in this means changing sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without recognizing both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.{{note|larryking04}} We are a welcoming and affirming church for our gay brothers and sisters.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}} Get ref
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} Get ref include gay affirmative stuff Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} Get ref
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.

#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-02-02T03:34:56Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn", and "comfort those who stand in need of comfort". (Mosiah 18:9) This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We seek to help them and advocate their cause. We seek to bring them peace, and empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen International], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and in Deseret Book.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.{{ref|hafen}}

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the church, in part because of the good news that the gospel brings for gay people.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God and as such, are loved by the church and its leaders. This love has always been extended by leaders of the church. In of the church's first pamphlets geared towards gay people, President Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball71}} President Hinckley has followed suit and repeated the love for gay people,{{ref|hinckley98}} and have affirmed the gays in the church as good people.{{ref|lattin}}

The affirmation that gay people are indeed good people are not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The church always strives to affirm gay people in our love for them, and in their value as human beings. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him and was worried that because he was gay, he didn't know whether he could continue being a member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed to him that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. He follows up with another story of a man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

The church has instructed leaders of the church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done despite the fact that the legislature was against these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family.{{ref|lds95}} One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

As a part of helping gay people live a life that will bring them peace, we also empower them to make choice that will bring peace by installing a hope that they are capable of living the commandments of God. We believe that all people have that capability. (1 Nephi 3:7)

Outside of the church, there is a prevalent belief that gay people are created with only one choice about their sexual behavior. For example, in the Californian Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that for gay people "the choice of life partner will be, by definition, someone of the opposite sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} They ruled that this choice was already made for them, "by consequence of their birth" and was "immutable". This thought is very harmful to gay people. This takes away their agency and enslaves them to their carnal desires. Those who want to put off the natural man but are told that option is not available to them may feel trapped. This can bring feelings of hopelessness and despair.

Some gay people have found such limitations have come in conflict with their inner desires to obey the commandments of God. Psychologists have found that instead of limiting a gay person's ability to determine the direction of their own life, that by increasing self-determination and autonomy that a psychologist can help a gay person find peace in their life.{{ref|SelfDetermination}} Instead, the American Psychological Association has instructed psychologists to help clients make their own choices and support them in living according to their own values, even in this means changing sexual orientation identity.{{ref|TherapeuticResponse}}

The message of the Church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose their own values according to the dictates of their own concious (AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to those values. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without recognizing both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms that gay people do have a choice and they are capable of living the commandments of God. It reads: "Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.{{note|larryking04}} We are a welcoming and affirming church for our gay brothers and sisters.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|TherapeuticResponse}} Get ref
#{{note|SelfDetermination}} Get ref include gay affirmative stuff Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} Get ref
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html New Horizons]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|hafen}} - [http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&ct=res&cd=1&ved=0CAkQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fnewsroom.lds.org%2Fldsnewsroom%2Feng%2Fpublic-issues%2Felder-bruce-c-hafen-speaks-on-same-sex-attraction&ei=7ZhjS7PaFo_-sgO45rmdAw&usg=AFQjCNG0NnHSPtjgTuxXZ9LD4KQyRTCkKw&sig2=NwjozIDi2qTV72sM8LJyZw Elder Bruce C. Hafen Speaks on Same-Sex Attraction] - LDS Newsroom
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.

#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer01}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-29T16:30:51Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church, as evidenced by the several organizations formed by these members, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories have been profiled in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, and in Deseret Book.{{ref|quietDesperation}} General Authorities typically attend these meetings, and the proceedings are published on the Church's web site.

The Church welcomes gay people, and gay people have responded by joining the church, in part because of the good news of the gospel that the church has for gay people.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

The Church has continued to seek how best to help affirm its gay members. They have instructed leaders of the church that "when members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

Sometimes gay members worry that their sexual orientation would somehow interfere with their standing in the church. Elder Holland recounts a story of a gay man who came to him and was worried that because he was gay, he didn't know whether he could continue being a member of the church. Elder Holland affirmed to him that being gay did not impede him from being a good member of the Church. He follows up with another story of a man with same-sex attractions who was faithful in the church. Of him, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

It is often debated whether gay people can chose their actions. There is prevalent belief that gay people are created without a choice in their sexual behavior, and unless they accept same-sex relationships, they are living a lie. For example, in the Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that "the choice of life partner will be, by definition, someone of the opposite sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} This teaching is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they are slaves to their sexual urges, and they have no power to decide how to live their lives. Gay people who want to chose a different path are told they cannot. This cripples them, and can lead to depression and even suicide. Psychologists have long advocated a person's right to self-determination. They have found that gay patients who are told they cannot

The message of the church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose for themselves what they will believe(AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to the dictates of their own conscience. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without presenting both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms this choice and teaches gay people that "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Church Handbook of Instructions
|year=1998
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
#{{note|chastity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Chastity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.3933737ad2ff28132eb22a86942826a0/?vgnextoid=bbd508f54922d010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=23e80bbce1d98010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Sexual Purity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____
}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
|pages=4
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=024644f8f206c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=338f18e7c379b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-29T02:25:05Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

It is often debated whether gay people can chose their actions. There is prevalent belief that gay people are created without a choice in their sexual behavior, and unless they accept same-sex relationships, they are living a lie. For example, in the Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that "the choice of life partner will be, by definition, someone of the opposite sex."{{ref|CaliforniaSupremeCourt}} This teaching is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they are slaves to their sexual urges, and they have no power to decide how to live their lives. Gay people who want to chose a different path are told they cannot. This cripples them, and can lead to depression and even suicide. Psychologists have long advocated a person's right to self-determination. They have found that gay patients who are told they cannot

The message of the church to all people is that "ye are free, ye are permitted to act for yourselves." (Helaman 14:30) While we teach against sexual relationships outside of a heterosexual marriage, we uphold that each individual is free to chose for themselves what they will believe(AoF 12), and advocate their free exercise to act according to the dictates of their own conscience. (D&C 134:2) The ability to chose is considered one of the most precious gifts given from God to man, and is one of the reasons for the war in heaven. Without presenting both options, a gay person does not truly have the ability to chose for themselves.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms this choice and teaches gay people that "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

While other organizations say that gay people are incapable of obeying the laws of God, the Church tells them that they can. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

It can be argued that this is only pro-gay if operate under the assumption that these statements are correct. That is the assumption we are operating under. Being anti-gay has a lot to do with intentions, and we have no other intention than to bring peace to our gay brothers and sisters by bringing them to Christ. Directing his comments to gay people who pursue same-sex relationships, Spencer W. Kimball taught "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

What is more important, there are gay people who also operate under the assumption that these things are true. These gay people deserve an organization that fights for their ability to chose an alternative lifestyle to the one the rest of the world presents. In no way, shape or form, is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints anti-gay.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Church Handbook of Instructions
|year=1998
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
#{{note|chastity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Chastity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.3933737ad2ff28132eb22a86942826a0/?vgnextoid=bbd508f54922d010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=23e80bbce1d98010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Sexual Purity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____
}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
|pages=4
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=024644f8f206c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=338f18e7c379b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-27T00:59:06Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

=== The church helps family members of gay people ===

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

=== The church helps gay people by empowering them ===

It is often debated whether gay people can chose their actions. There is prevalent belief that gay people are created without a choice in their sexual behavior, and unless they pursue same-sex relationships, they are living a lie. For example, in the Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that "the choice of life partner will be, by definition, someone of the opposite sex. This teaching is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they are slaves to their sexual urges, and they have no power to decide how to live their lives. This is particularly harmful to the many people attracted to the same gender who want to chose a different path.

The Church teaches that all people "are free to chose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death." (2 Nephi 2:27) The ability to chose was of fundamental importance in the war in heaven. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms this choice and teaches gay people that "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

=== The Church helps gay people find peace ===

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

We have no other reason for teaching the law of chastity other than out of love for our fellow man. Spencer W. Kimball taught that "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Church Handbook of Instructions
|year=1998
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
#{{note|chastity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Chastity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.3933737ad2ff28132eb22a86942826a0/?vgnextoid=bbd508f54922d010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=23e80bbce1d98010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Sexual Purity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____
}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
|pages=4
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=024644f8f206c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=338f18e7c379b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-27T00:54:14Z

JoshuaJohanson: /* The church empowers gay people */

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

==The church empowers gay people==

It is often debated whether gay people can chose their actions. There is prevalent belief that gay people are created without a choice in their sexual behavior, and unless they pursue same-sex relationships, they are living a lie. For example, in the Supreme Court case "In Re: Marriage", the court ruled that "the choice of life partner will be, by definition, someone of the opposite sex. This teaching is very harmful to gay people. It teaches them that they are slaves to their sexual urges, and they have no power to decide how to live their lives. This is particularly harmful to the many people attracted to the same gender who want to chose a different path.

The Church teaches that all people "are free to chose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death." (2 Nephi 2:27) The ability to chose was of fundamental importance in the war in heaven. This empowers the gay person. It teaches that they are in control of their destiny, and they can make of their life what they want.

''God Loveth His Children'' affirms this choice and teaches gay people that "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

== The Church helps gay people find peace ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

We have no other reason for teaching the law of chastity other than out of love for our fellow man. Spencer W. Kimball taught that "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

== The church helps family members of gay people ==

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Church Handbook of Instructions
|year=1998
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
#{{note|chastity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Chastity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.3933737ad2ff28132eb22a86942826a0/?vgnextoid=bbd508f54922d010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=23e80bbce1d98010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Sexual Purity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____
}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
|pages=4
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=024644f8f206c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=338f18e7c379b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|Savin-Williams}} Savin-Williams RC, Ream GL. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17195103?ordinalpos=7&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Prevalence and stability of sexual orientation components during adolescence and young adulthood.]
#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-26T16:33:52Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|kimball69}}

==The church empowers gay people==

''God Loveth His Children'', a pamphlet produced by the church for Latter-day Saints with same-sex attractions, reads "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

== The Church helps gay people find peace ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

We have no other reason for teaching the law of chastity other than out of love for our fellow man. Spencer W. Kimball taught that "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

== The church helps family members of gay people ==

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
|first=Jeffrey R.
|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&sourceId=e5cbba12dc825110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD
}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball69}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
|publisher=Bookcraft
|isbn=978-0-88494-192-7
}}
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
#{{note|lds92}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
#{{note|lds95}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=The Family: A Proclamation to the World
|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,161-1-11-1,00.html
}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|title=Church Handbook of Instructions
|year=1998
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
#{{note|chastity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Chastity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.3933737ad2ff28132eb22a86942826a0/?vgnextoid=bbd508f54922d010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=23e80bbce1d98010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
|author=LDS Church
|contribution=Sexual Purity
|title=Gospel Library Gospel Topics
|year=2007
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|contribution-url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____
}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
#{{note|lattin}}{{Citation
|last=Lattin
|first=Don
|title=Musings of the Main Mormon: Gordon B. Hinckley
|year=1997
|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
|last1= Matis
|first1= Fred
|last2= Matis
|first2= Marilyn
|last3= Mansfield
|first3= Ty
|title= In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-gender Attraction
|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9781590383315
|oclc= 55644980
}}.
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
|last=Wickman
|first=Lance B.
|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
|pages=4
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=024644f8f206c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=338f18e7c379b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
|oclc= 38855822
}}.
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|Savin-Williams}} Savin-Williams RC, Ream GL. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17195103?ordinalpos=7&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Prevalence and stability of sexual orientation components during adolescence and young adulthood.]
#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-26T03:07:53Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|miracle}}

==The church empowers gay people==

''God Loveth His Children'', a pamphlet produced by the church for Latter-day Saints with same-sex attractions, reads "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

== The Church helps gay people find peace ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

We have no other reason for teaching the law of chastity other than out of love for our fellow man. Spencer W. Kimball taught that "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

== The church helps family members of gay people ==

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley87}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
#{{note|Leigh}}[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=35ce1a01e8d43210VgnVCM100000176f620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD “The Best Thing I Can Do for Leigh,”] Ensign, Sep 2009, 62–65
#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
#{{note|Hinckley87}}{{Citation
|last=Hinckley
|first=Gordon B.
|author-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|title=Reverence and Morality
|magazine=Ensign
|date=May 1987
|year=1987
|pages=45
|url=http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=969567700817b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____
}}
#{{note|hinckley98}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=7c86605ff590c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____''1998 What Are People Asking about Us?] Gordon B. Hinckley, Official Site of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved on September 28, 2007.
#{{note|hinckley99}}Hinckley, Gordon B. (Nov 1999). [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=ff1b6a4430c0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD. Why We Do Some of the Things We Do]. Ensign.
#{{note|larryking04}}{{Citation
|last1=Hinckley
|first1=Gordon B.
|author1-link=Gordon B. Hinckley
|last2=King
|first2=Larry
|author2-link=Larry King
|title=A Conversation with Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
|date=December 26 2004
|year=2004
|url=http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0412/26/lkl.01.html
}}
#{{note|Holland07}}{{Citation
|last=Holland
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|title=Helping Those Who Struggle with Same-Gender Attraction
|year=2007
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}}
#{{note|Holland09}} [http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_13766464 LDS apostle: SLC gay-rights measures could work for state]
#{{note|kimball64}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=A Counselling Problem in the Church (transcript)
|date=July 10 1964
|year=1964
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/counselling.html
}}
#{{note|kimball65}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
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|chapter=Love vs. Lust
|date=January 5 1965
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|url=http://mentalhealthlibrary.info/library/same/samelds/samelds2001/links/kimball/kimball.htm
}}
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|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=The Miracle of Forgiveness
|year=1969
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}}
#{{note|kimball70}}Spencer W. Kimball and Mark E. Petersen [http://www.connellodonovan.com/transgressors.html Hope for Transgressors] 1970.
#{{note|kimball71}}{{Citation
|last=Kimball
|first=Spencer W.
|authorlink=Spencer W. Kimball
|title=New Horizons for Homosexuals
|year=1971
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html
|publisher=LDS Church
}}.
#{{note|kimball80}}Spencer W. Kimball, “[http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=d70ffc3157a6b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality],” Ensign, Nov 1980, 94
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|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.connellodonovan.com/transgressors2.html
}}.
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|author=LDS Church
|title=Understanding and Helping Those Who Have Homosexual Problems: Suggestions for Ecclesiastical Leaders
|year=1992
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|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/judeochristian/protestantism/mormon/mormon-homosexuality
}}.
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|year=1995
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
|publisher=LDS Church
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}}.
#{{note|lds98}}{{Citation
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#{{note|GodLoveth}}{{cite web |url= http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=3e05c8322e1b3110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ |title= [[God Loveth His Children]] |accessdate= 2007-12-07 }}
#{{note|fsy}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b3bc55cbf541229058520974e44916a0/?vgnextoid=d6371b08f338c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&sourceId=1907be335dc20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____ Sexual Purity], For the Strength of Youth: Fulfilling Our Duty to God, 26
#{{note|lds04}}"First Presidency Statement on Same-Gender Marriage," [[19 October]] [[2004]])
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}}.
#{{note|sexualpurity}}{{Citation
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}}.
#{{note|LDS09}} [http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/news-releases-stories/statement-given-to-salt-lake-city-council-on-nondiscrimination-ordinances Statement Given to Salt Lake City Council on Nondiscrimination Ordinances]
#{{note|laumann}}{{cite book
|title=The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States
|last=Laumann
|first=Edward O.
|date=1994
|publisher=University of Chicago Press
|url=http://books.google.com/books?id=72AHO0rE2HoC&pg=PA4&lpg=PA4&dq=the+social+organization+of+sexuality+1990&source=web&ots=kHfFtQQH7j&sig=ZS5sk4GqzcR4e8mLVIHTNPsHt-Y#PPA299,M1
|page=299}}
#{{note|DivineMarriage}}[http://www.newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/the-divine-institution-of-marriage The Divine Institution of Marriage]
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|date=April 13, 1997
|newspaper=San Francisco Chronicle
|url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/1997/04/13/SC36289.DTL
}}
#{{note|quietDesperation}}{{Citation
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|last3= Mansfield
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|url= http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4772927
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 2004
|publisher= Deseret Book
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
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}}.
#{{note|mcbride}}{{Citation
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|first=Max Ford
|title=Effect of Visual Stimuli in Electric Aversion Therapy (Dissertation presented to the Department of Psychology of Brigham Young University)
|place=Brigham Young University, Provo, Utah
|date=August 1976
|year=1976
}}
#{{note|monson08}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695250131,00.html |publisher= ''[[Deseret Morning News]]'' |date= February 4, 2008 |last= Moore |first= Carrie A. |title= Thomas S. Monson named as new LDS Church president |quote= depends on what the disagreement is. If it's an apostasy situation, that would not be appropriate. If it's something political, there is room for opinion here and there on either side. }}
#{{note|moore}}{{Citation
|last=Moore
|first=Carrie A.
|url=http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660207378,00.html
|title=Gay LDS men detail challenges
|date=March 30 2007
|newspaper=Deseret Morning News
}}
#{{note|mormonismmodern}} {{Citation|title= In Focus: Mormonism in Modern America |quote= Every person on this planet has personal challenges. Some have challenges with same-sex attraction, some have problems with opposite-gender attraction that have to be controlled. |url= http://pewforum.org/events/?EventID=143 }}
#{{note|oaks95}} [http://lds.org/portal/site/LDSOrg/menuitem.b12f9d18fae655bb69095bd3e44916a0/?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=43786e9ce9b1c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1''1995 Dallin H. Oaks Statement''], Official Site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
#{{note|oaks07}}{{Citation
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|authorlink=Lance B. Wickman
|editor=LDS Church
|title=Same-Gender Attraction
|place=Salt Lake City, Utah
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|year=2007
|url=http://www.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=27f71f1dd189f010VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD&vgnextchannel=726511154963d010VgnVCM1000004e94610aRCRD
}}
#{{note|packer}} Packer [http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=67d1a1615ac0c010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&hideNav=1 Ye Are the Temple of God]
#{{note|packer72}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=The Message: Why Stay Morally Clean
|date=July 1972
|year=1972
|periodical=New Era
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}}.
#{{note|packer76}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To Young Men Only: General Conference Priesthood Session, [[October 2]], [[1976]]
|year=1976
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/only.shtml
}}.
#{{note|packer78}}{{Citation
|last=Packer
|first=Boyd K.
|authorlink=Boyd K. Packer
|title=To the One: Address given to the Twelve Stake Fireside, Brigham Young University, March 5, 1978
|year=1978
|publisher=LDS Church
|url=http://www.lds-mormon.com/tto.shtml
}}.
#{{note|park}}{{Citation
|last= Park
|first= Jason
|title= Resolving Homosexual Problems: A Guide for LDS Men
|url= http://centurypubl.com/Resolving_Homosexual_Problems_LDS_Men.htm
|accessdate= 2009-07-30
|year= 1997
|publisher= Century Publishing
|location= Salt Lake City, Utah
|isbn= 9780941846066
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}}.
#{{note|quinn}}D. Michael Quinn, [http://www.affirmation.org/learning/prelude.shtml "Prelude to the National 'Defense of Marriage' Campaign: Civil Discrimination Against Feared or Despised Minorities"], ''[[Dialogue: A Journal of Mormon Thought]]'', '''33''':3, p. 1-52 (2001)
#{{note|scott}}{{Citation
|last=Scott
|first=Richard G.
|authorlink=Richard G. Scott
|title=The Atonement Can Secure Your Peace and Happiness
|date=November 2006
|magazine=Ensign
|pages=40
|url=http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2006.htm/ensign%20november%202006.htm/the%20atonement%20can%20secure%20your%20peace%20and%20happiness.htm
}}.
#{{note|simon}}STEPHANIE SIMON [http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124950491516608883.html#articleTabs%3Darticle A New Therapy on Faith and Sexual Identity : Psychological Association Revises Treatment Guidelines to Allow Counselors to Help Clients Reject Their Same-Sex Attractions]
#{{note|robinson}}{{cite journal |publisher=American Psychological Association |journal= Professional Psychology: Research and Practice |title= Initial empirical and clinical findings concerning the change process for ex-gays |url= http://www.drthrockmorton.com/article.asp?id=1 |date= June 2002 |volume= 33 |number= 3 |pages= 242–248 |last= Throckmorton |first= Warren |doi= 10.1037/0735-7028.33.3.242 }}
#{{note|snow}}{{Citation
|last=Snow
|first=Lorenzo
|author-link=Lorenzo Snow
|periodical=Millennial Star
|date=August 31 1899
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}}.
#{{note|Savin-Williams}} Savin-Williams RC, Ream GL. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17195103?ordinalpos=7&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Prevalence and stability of sexual orientation components during adolescence and young adulthood.]
#{{note|Seligman}}p. 156, Seligman, Martin E.P., ''What You Can Change and What You Can't: The Complete Guide to Self Improvement'' Knopf, 1993; ISBN 0-679-41024-4
#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]

Utilizador:InProgress/Same-sex attraction

2010-01-26T02:58:28Z

JoshuaJohanson:

"Love thy neighbor as thyself" is one of the two great commandments in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There is no teaching or commandment in the church that conflicts with this law. We believe all mankind are our brothers and sisters. All who are baptized into the church have made a covenant to "mourn with those who mourn, and comfort those who stand in need of comfort". This is especially true of our brothers and sisters who are attracted to the same gender,{{ref|oaks95}} commonly referred to as gay or lesbian.

We welcome our gay brothers and sisters into the church, and affirm them as good people. We empower them to make decisions that will help them attain happiness in this life, and we help them with whatever trial they are facing. We do this regardless of how they chose to live their lives.

==The church welcomes gay people==

The Church welcomes all people to come unto Christ. President Hinckley has specifically extended this welcome to gay men and women. In 1999, he made the following statement:

"As I said from this pulpit one year ago, our hearts reach out to those who refer to themselves as gays and lesbians. We love and honor them as sons and daughters of God. They are welcome in the Church." {{ref|hinckley99}}

The Church has published several publications designed to reach out to members with same-sex attractions. The most recent, God Loveth His Children, assures that "No one is, or ever could be, excluded from the circle of God’s love or the extended arms of His Church, for we are all His beloved sons and daughters."{{ref|GodLoveth}} Elder Oaks similarly stated: "Church leaders are sometimes asked whether there is any place in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for persons with homosexual or lesbian susceptibilities or feelings. Of course there is." {{ref|oaks95}}

Many are faithful members of the church. LDS Family Services estimates that there are four or five members in every unit of the Church who is attracted to the same sex.{{ref|EvergreenIndividual}} Their stories and testimonies have been published in the Ensign{{ref|EnsignSSA}}, are printed in books sold at Deseret Book{{ref|quietDesperation}}, are covered by the media{{ref|moore}}{{ref|MediaSSA}} and are found on the Internet{{ref|InternetSSA}}. Many have formed unofficial organizations, such as [http://www.evergreeninternational.org Evergreen], [http://northstarlds.org North Star], and [http://www.ldslights.org Northern Lights]. These organizations are composed of people with same-sex attractions who uphold the teachings of the church without reservation. Every year, a member of the quorum of seventies gives a special address at the annual Evergreen Conference.

==The church affirms gay people==

Like all of God's children, the church teaches that gay people are beloved sons and daughters of God. Sometimes, gay people do not feel they are loved by God. The Church affirms them by teaching them that the church loves them and that God loves them. In "A Letter to a Friend", President Spencer W. Kimball reminds gay people to "Remember, the Lord loves you, the Church loves you."{{ref|kimball78}}

Instructions given to leaders in the church in 1992 instructed leaders on how to affirm gay members: "When members with homosexual problems come to you for help, they may feel guilty and in despair, having been unable to change their lives. You can instill hope in them. Help them to know that you and their Heavenly Father love them and that they can be healed from their afflictions through the atonement of the Savior." {{ref|lds92}}

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley said "People inquire about our position on those who consider themselves so-called gays and lesbians. My response is that we love them as sons and daughters of God." {{ref|hinckley98}}

In response to an accusation that the church rejects our gay brothers and sisters, President Packer responded "We do not reject you,... We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. {{ref|packer01}}

Speaking of a gay man, Elder Holland said "I weep with admiration and respect at the faith and courage of such a man who is living with a challenge I have never faced. I love him and the thousands like him, male or female, who "fight the good fight" (1 Timothy 6:12). I commend his attitude to all who struggle with-or who are helping others who struggle with-same-gender attraction." {{ref|holland07}}

Beyond simply expressing love for gay people, the church affirms that there are indeed good people. In a 1995 interview, President Hinckley said: "Now we have gays in the church. Good people."{{ref|lattin}}

This affirmation is not limited to gay people who keep the standards of the church. In the Miracle of Forgiveness, Spencer W. Kimball said that men who were pursuing same-sex relationships were "basically good people who have become trapped in sin."{{ref|miracle}}

==The church empowers gay people==

''God Loveth His Children'', a pamphlet produced by the church for Latter-day Saints with same-sex attractions, reads "You are a son or daughter of God, and our hearts reach out to you in warmth and affection. Notwithstanding your present same-gender attractions, you can be happy during this life, lead a morally clean life, perform meaningful service in the Church, enjoy full fellowship with your fellow Saints, and ultimately receive all the blessings of eternal life."{{ref|GodLoveth}}

== The Church helps gay people find peace ==

The mission of the church is to bring all people to Christ. We believe that this is one of the fundamental ways in which we can serve our fellow man. We believe we can come closer to Christ by taking upon us his name through the covenant of baptism, which includes a covenant to obey his commandments. Teaching and encouraging our fellow man to obey the teachings of Christ is an important part in bringing them to Christ. This is the greatest good we can do for our fellow man, and what will bring them the greatest joy.

The path that leads to eternal life is straight and narrow, but we want as many of our brothers and sisters to find that path as possible. Christ taught against fornication and adultery, and we believe that includes all sexual relationships besides that of a husband and a wife. We teach and encourage all to obey this commandment, as part of our duty to bring them to Christ. Elder Oaks explains the natural consequences if gay people do not follow the law of chastity: "Those commandments, if they are not adhered to, result in guilt. That guilt is painful to people. There are two solutions to that guilt. One is to disbelieve in God or hold a congress and pretend that you can change God's commandments. The other is to discontinue that kind of conduct to the best of your ability."{{ref|oaks86}} While the church may not follow the world's approach, we believe that our approach of promoting the commandments of the Lord will help alleviate the guilt people feel by inspiring them to live are higher moral code.

There are people who feel that by promoting this higher moral code, we are rejecting those who do not follow it. Elder Packer responded to this concern as to how it applies specifically to gay people. He said:

"We understand why some feel we reject them. That is not true. We do not reject you, only immoral behavior. We cannot reject you, for you are the sons and daughters of God. We will not reject you, because we love you. You may even feel that we do not love you. That also is not true. Parents know, and one day you will know, that there are times when parents and we who lead the Church must extend tough love when failing to teach and to warn and to discipline is to destroy." {{ref|packer01}}

There are many gay members of the church who find the teachings of the church to be encouraging. Elder Wickman explains that this is one of the reasons why the Church teaches about homosexuality: "One of the purposes of that discussion was to try to be hopeful and encouraging to those who do but nonetheless want to conform their lives to what they understand the Lord's teachings to be."{{ref|mormonismmodern}}

We have no other reason for teaching the law of chastity other than out of love for our fellow man. Spencer W. Kimball taught that "the Church and the Lord have no ulterior motives - the only desire being for the restoration of you, yourself, a son of God, made in his image.{{ref|kimball78}}

Joseph Smith once taught that a religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things cannot produce the faith necessary for salvation. Certainly, we would want both the gay and straight members of the church to be able to produce the faith necessary for salvation. Our eternal family would not be complete without our gay brothers and sisters.

== The church helps family members of gay people learn to love and accept them as Christ does ==

One way that the church helps gay people is by supporting their families, and encouraging them to love and reach out to their family members regardless of how they chose to live their lives. In a 1992 statement to Church leaders, the Church counseled: "If a person with homosexual problems chooses not to change, family members may have difficulty maintaining feelings of love and acceptance toward the person. Encourage them to continue loving the person and hoping that he or she may repent." {{ref|lds92}}

This was reiterated by Elder Oaks in 1997: "Surely if we are counseled as a body of Church membership to reach out with love and understanding to those ‘struggling with these issues,’ that obligation rests with particular intensity on parents who have children struggling with these issues... even children who are engaged in sinful behavior associated with these issues" {{ref|oaks07}}

Families with gay members are strengthened through living the principles of love and respect taught by Jesus Christ and reiterated in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. One woman with a lesbian sister submitted an Ensign article in which she describes how the church has helped her with her relationship with her sister (Leigh). "I know the best thing I can do to have a close relationship with my sister is to have a close relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son. Leigh recently commented that it has been through the way our family has loved her that she has felt what she understood to be God’s love." {{ref|Leigh}}

One of the best services that we can do for our gay brothers and sisters is to help them feel the love of God through our actions.

== The Church helps gay people ==

While the Church seeks to help all people with their problems, a special call has been issued for members of the Church to help gay people. In 1995, Elder Oaks taught "All should understand that persons (and their family members) struggling with the burden of same-sex attraction are in special need of the love and encouragement that is a clear responsibility of Church members, who have signified by covenant their willingness "to bear one another’s burdens" (Mosiah 18:8) "and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Gal. 6:2)."{{ref|Oaks95}} Three years later, President Hinckley echoed Elder Oaks remarks "We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties." {{ref|Hinckley98}}

There are many ways in which the church helps the gay population. For example, the church is an advocate for employment and housing rights for gay people. When Salt Lake City asked the Church for its opinion on whether to pass ordinance to protect gay people from housing and employment discrimination, the Church supported the measure calling it a "common-sense right" and a question of "human dignity".{{ref|LDS09}} Elder Holland said it could be a model for the rest of Utah.{{ref|Holland09}} This was done after the Utah legislature voted down these rights.

Beyond the legal protection for gay people, the church has also sought to protect gay people from physical and verbal abuse. Elder Oaks taught "Our doctrines obviously condemn those who engage in so-called "gay bashing"-physical or verbal attacks on persons thought to be involved in homosexual or lesbian behavior."{{ref|Oaks95}}

The church helps gay people by steering them away from destructive patterns, such as blaming themselves for their sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}} The leadership has warned against therapies to try to change sexual orientation that have been shown to be abusive by the scientific field,{{ref|Oaks07}} using marriage as a therapeutic step to change sexual orientation,{{ref|Hinckley97}} and have instructed leaders not to encourage gay members to cultivate heterosexual feelings, since it often leads them to frustration and discouragement.{{ref|lds92}} They have assured gay members that being gay is not a sin{{ref|oaks07}} and if they remain faithful they can receive all the blessings that Heavenly Father has promised his children, with no requirement to change sexual orientation.{{ref|Holland07}}

==Related links==
*[[/Myths about the Church and homosexuality|l1=Myths about the Church and homosexuality]]
*[[/The Church and gay rights|l1=The Church and gay rights]]
*[[/Causes of Homosexuality|l1=Causes of Homosexuality]]
*[[/Can the Church welcome gay people while teaching against same-sex relationships]]

==Endnotes==
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#{{note|kimball78}} [http://www.connellodonovan.com/horizons.html A Letter to A Friend]
#{{note|apa2000}}[http://www.aglp.org/pages/cfactsheets.html#Anchor-Gay-14210 American Psychiatric Association] 2000
#{{note|apa}}[http://www.apahelpcenter.org/articles/article.php?id=31 American Psychological Association Help Center] Sexual Orientation and Homosexuality
#{{note|apa2007}}[http://www.apa.org/pi/lgbc/publications/therapeutic-response.pdf Appropriate Therapeutic Responses to Sexual Orientation]
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#{{note|EvergreenIndividual}} Evergreen International [http://www.evergreeninternational.org/Individuals.htm Resources for Individuals]
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#{{note|westboro1}}{{cite news |url= http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,695248839,00.html |title= Church group plans protest at Pres. Hinckley's funeral |first= Jared |last= Page |date= January 31 2008 |publisher= ''Deseret Morning News'' }}
#{{note|honorcode2}}{{cite news |url= http://deseretnews.com/dn/view/0,1249,660205345,00.html |title= Y. urged to clarify its policy on gays |date= March 22, 2007 |last= Walch |first= Tad}}
#{{note|westboro2}}{{cite news |url= http://www.sltrib.com/ci_8210106 |title= Kirby: My surprise at finding that I belong to a gay church |first= Robert |last= Kirby |publisher= ''Salt Lake Tribune'' }}</ref>
#{{note|PlaceInTheKingdom}}[http://centurypubl.com/Place_Kingdom_Same_Sex_Attraction.htm ''A Place in the Kingdom: Spiritual Insights from Latter-day Saints about Same-Sex Attraction.'']
#{{note|suicide}}Wichstrøm L, Hegna K. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12653422?ordinalpos=22&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Sexual orientation and suicide attempt: a longitudinal study of the general Norwegian adolescent population.]
#{{note|yarhouse}} Yarhouse MA. [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16281794?ordinalpos=13&itool=EntrezSystem2.PEntrez.Pubmed.Pubmed_ResultsPanel.Pubmed_DefaultReportPanel.Pubmed_RVDocSum Same-sex attraction, homosexual orientation, and gay identity: a three-tier distinction for counseling and pastoral care]
#{{note|EnsignSSA}}For example, see [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/1997.htm/ensign%20january%201997.htm/becoming%20whole%20again.htm Becoming Whole Again] and [http://library.lds.org/nxt/gateway.dll/Magazines/Ensign/2002.htm/ensign%20august%202002.htm/my%20battle%20with%20samesex%20attraction.htm My Battle with Same-Sex Attraction]
#{{note|MediaSSA}}[http://deseretbook.com/authors/author-interview?author_id=30561&interview_id=2095 Everyday Lives, Everyday Values Interview with Fred and Marilyn Matis and Ty Mansfield, authors of ''In Quiet Desperation: Understanding the Challenge of Same-Gender Attraction''],
#{{note|InternetSSA}}[http://www.evergreeninternational.org/testimonies.htm Evergreen Testimonies]